Neverending Story [Game]

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear!


"Fosh, fosh, who has made all those sausages. They are Rumanian-pepperoni-pepper-vampire-sausages without garlic, made for Draculas only. So all those rainbow-men ar vampires? Look, look, they have all very not sunburned faces and black Hitler-hair. And all those cloaks with red linings and look how their teeth are growing by the hour. We must run like hell."
-"Jaja, said the poet, "But I have to kill some of them first. I happen to have a Kalashnikov with silverbullets in my backpocket.
And he started the shooting. Puff+28.
-"Pfff,+28, two too much", he said,-"This Russian thing is difficult to control. But who cares. I am not a racist, but they were only half-humans and noone will miss them even in Rumania.
The rest of the Draculas were scared, but hungry for the girls and the poets blood, and they came closer and closer.
-"To hell with the statistic", the poet let the Kalashnikov sing its Poffpoffsong again. 32 times.
-"Oh dear, oh dear," said the girl. "Stop now or you will get problem. You have irritated all those Draculas and they are really pissed over their disturbed convention. Your bloodthirst will be our death."
-"Jaja, okey," he looked unhappy. "But after I stopped the dogfucking I have a need for drastic actions, like killing."
-"Fosh, fosh, dogfucking or killing? 26 per post. Couldn't you collect stamps or play cello instead?"
-"Do you have an advice for me?
-"I have a Shakespearesonnet I wrote myself, that maybe can talk to your innerpoet.

Fuck Dogs or Kill,
What is your Will
For Grunt and Sweat,
Under a Weary Heat,
But what Worst you Dread,
Of Something from this Thread,
With this Regard,
You Won't get Hard,
And go so Deep,
To Die, to Dream, to Sleep...

-"Oh dear", exclaimed the poet, "You are so right. I will from now on be a better poet.
-"Fosh, fosh, the girl looked with great fear at her best friend, "Your teeth, dear! And you are not so sunburned any longer. You have suddenly Hitler-hair...and you look hungry. For me...
-"I think I will love your blood, dear freckled girl..."
The poet hugged the poor girl but then...

[AGAG]

Hitler hair? me?

and he was ready to take her blood. It turns that he ate one Rumanian sausage with too much olive oil behind the girl's back and in his digestive system it turned into a vampire cathedral that took space until it reached his nervous spine. The sausage had too much cheese in it and a rumanian curse. His hitler hair was growing steadily and the dense crowd of pale vampie-hitlers was growing too. It was getting dense and closed upon the two hugging poets. Oh yes, the girl was a poet too. But the narrators are sometimes unjust and forgetful. But but! the story is neverending and now the two are midst a cloud of angry rainbow muscular vampire hitler men, and they want blood. The vampirepoet couldn't let this happen and took a sturdy grilling fork from one of the sausages left overs. The kalashnikov had no more silver and it had stuck, so he couldn't sing the poofsong this time. The poet, he yielded his cuisine tool bravely in a hitler stance and said, as a hitler speech "Get away, I am so sorry but I don't love rainbows that much. Maybe just dogs and now blood but not when you are trying to drink it from me or from my fellowpoet friends. That ist verboten heil and heil! those are JUST for me. Heil heil again!" And then swoosh and slash, he pierced and drilled though the vampire cloud. There goes one and then the other. They fell with horrible videogame wounds and they couldn't defend themselves since they were blinded by the blood thirst and an overwhelming amount of rainbowmuscles. The path opened and the two ran as fast as they could to the distance.

He only could kill twelve and he was dissapointed when the vampire screams were loud and pale in the horizon. "Oh I will never use a kalashnikov again" He said very sadly to the girl "that poof poof is just too unreliable and russian for my taste.. Just twelve!... but! I am still a vampire and they interrupted our blood transfusion rituals, let us go on my dear friend" She agreed dearly for her friend. It was night and they sat underneath a graveyard tree. Then they hugged again, it was full moon and she tilted her head sideways and he nibbled and nibbled in the most perfect of vampire landscapes.. After a crow crowed, she blushed "Um um um" he said and then he stopped "Yes yes, I nibble and even bite again and again all around and it is really fun... but no blood comes out! What is wrong? I am just recently a vampire and and... what vein should I be looking for? Or is it an arthery? Oh this is, oh, so complicated." But the girl, she was always ready and she carried a full details version of a human body atlas all the time. She read it in the bus. There she explained in excruciating detail how the blood goes back and forth and how the heart made pum and then maybe tum. Then the crow crowed once more, they were ready and with this newfound blood-street knowledge, he started the ritual again. He could find the main blood avenue in a swish and then she...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

You forgot the "Now there was a bigbig crasch-kaboom", so I vill make it doubble...


said-"Oh dear, oh dear, that was almost too good and romantic. It was like the earth moved. An earthquake? Or what?"
-"No,no, it was the sun raising over the horizon and all the Hitlerhaired, from the Dracula-party, that were exposed, to the first light, crackeliboomed and exploded. In a big kaboom and are now wiped out. They hadn't counted on the earlier sunrising in Finland and you and I were in time in your dark cellar."
-"Oh, but we can't stay here among potatos and empty jamjars. We have things to do and we will be bored to death. We must ask father for help."
And they howled for papa Öhubble 1 that came rushing. (Öhubble 2 is a thief that have stolen number 1's password, at a party in Ö10's house)
-"What are you two doing here in the darkness? And what have you done with your necks? You are hurt!"
Öhubble was suspicious and the girl explained that the rainbowpresident hade infected them with Draculablood and that they only had bitten each other.
-"No problem then", said Öhubble. -"It has stayed in the family, since you poet are like a son to me. I will make a decoction familysize and cure you in no time".
And snippsnapp he made a medicin from frog-tongues, swine-tails, green peas, snake-stomachs, cockroach-feet and some secret herbs. Ten minutes after they drank the badsmelling and horribletasteing drink they were no-vampires any longer.
-"Thank you mister", the poet said, "but I must admit that it also was a little fun to be a vampire. Look how my Hitlerhair has changed now and my teeth are back to normal. I can't suck blood with this new-old ordinary teeth and if I don't fuck dogs, shit rainbows or kill 26 persons per post I will be very, very restless. So what can I do now"?
-"Oh dear, I am sure that we can find something to do and we can always start to play cello", said the girl and smiled, now without the dangerously sharp canineteeth. Shall we go out and celebrate that we can see the sun again, without explodings".
-"Jaja, but I miss the sucking," said the poet and tried to look miserable.

But, but, what now? A bigbig Crasch-Kaboom from the roof.
"-Huh!" said Öhubble, -"It sounded like an alienbeambubble was landing. Is it time now? Again! Or...

[AGAG]

or no.. it may be a big cat... a BIG finnish cat so I will get my big Heckler & Koch ready with some fish bullets. Have you ever dealt with that kind of cat fleas?" He got out the big barrel and then after some progressive boomsong, the ceiling was all filled with holes like a Finno-swiss cheese. The cat had a spaceship with him and it was wrecked. He was a messenger and he looked very worried with his thick mustache. Then he fell through the He was wounded and from his heart he meowed a ballad with the most beautiful of alien harmonies:

"Now I think I will have to stop
I have been treated like a mop
Like a misprepared soup
Or maybe fungus in a foot.
Through the floor came the French
And thought this was the D-day
Nothing did they say
we aliens have no trench.

We will come back to life
but please bring a cutting knife
I had brought this letter to you
Dear traitorous german friend
Please don't throw me in the loo
And no ghosts will ever be send"

He then made a gut wrenching noise and said goodbye to this cruel world apparently. Hubble said "Huh, this cats get weirder this days... he sounded like some new yorker with a very good ear. But oh well, let us read that letter dear daughter. It seems misteriously extraterrestrial." The cat was agonizing in the floor and they read the letter in silence. The poet had went to the porsch and from there he threw a small rock that caused a five vehicle accident killing 23. "OH NO, not again!" He said hitting himself in the head. But then the girl poet interrupted his hair pulling and she came out of the wood house with very worried eyes. "What has happened?" Asked the poet. She answered "HE... he is coming! but but...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Good poem! I know it was there!

I have no idea who HE is. It can't be Fucking, it is not his style at all. This HE must be a very formal Alien and an animalactivist, since he sent the cat.
Read the letter!
"I HOPE THAT THIS LETTER WILL FIND YOU, FRECKLED GIRL IN GOOD HEALTH. THIS BIG CAT WILL BRING YOU MY KINDEST REGARDS AND TREAT HIM WITH CARE AND LOVE. HE WILL SPEAK TO YOU AND YOU SHALL LISTEN CAREFULLY TO HIS WISE WORDS. IF YOU MISTREAT HIM THERE CAN BE ENORMOUS CONSEQUENCES.
WITH LOVE LODIMO 7.
THE CATS NAME IS KARL516.

The poet was suddenly very pale.
-"God Heavens Lord. And I shot him! I thought he was an ordinary, but unusually big monstermustachecat. Vojne, vojne! And those 23 I killed in the last post. I am soon over the statistic. Again! Can you help me to repair the cat?"
And the girl started to pull out the barrelbullets from the poor animal. He was surprisingly cooperative and pointed with his big paw where the bullets had striked. It went well and he was soon sewed and cleaned up.
He started to talk.
-"Miau mie ma muiaiu mo," he said.
-"And we are happy to have you here", answered the poet rapidly and blushed. "I didn't mean to harm you. It was the barrel that went off by itself"...
-"Ma mie".
"Jaja, sorry, sorry. I hope you will heal fast. Would you like some fishfingers or maybe ladyfingers?"
-"MIu mä!!!"
-"Ok, no no! So you are allergic to both fish and ladies. Constipation? Aha I understand!
-"Mamiy, Pekka, mie, Lodimo7, miuuuuau...
-"Aha", said the girl, "Your master Lodimo7 is an Alien-revolutionary and fight Pekka Fucking. He wants to build a Finnish Guerilla. Jaja, we will see what we can do.
-"Miuuu, miuuu!"
-"Jaja, but it is not so easy, as to ask the whole Finland to take part. They have other things to do you know...
-"MUI ma memaui!"
-" Yes, we understand that this is important! But,but, we are only two impractical dreamers ! And! I think you better ask someone else."
-"MIUUAUIUUUUIIIAAUIAUIIOOÄÅÖÅÄÖÅUAA!!!!
-" God, he is ANGRY! What shall we DO?"
The poet backed from the furious cat...
Crasch, kaboom and...

[AGAG]

swish, he had impulsively hit the cat violently with a thick metal coated copy of Anna Karenina the girl had in a corner. It was an impulse and the cat fell asleep with the first dense Russian literature strike... and unfortunately he only liked light novels. But it wasn't just one time, the poet had a life long fear of cats and their Máäåæåúµs, so his nervous system told him to go on. So, bam and more bam, he hit the poor furry orange cat three times the way someone would hit an innocent cockroach on a dinner table on Thanksgivings.. and it would have gone on and on but the girl stopped him as fast as she could. "No no no!" She said, stopping the russian hammer-weapon "That "ååu" meant he was our friend, he was very excited to tell us that, maybe you heard "äåu" and that would have meant a threat.. you should extend your ear for vowels and dialects..." But although the poet was worried and sorry about his waterbottle impulses, the cat was already in a profound and seemingly permanent visit to Cat paradise. "Oh no... look at this!" said the poet with tears on his eyes "What has this evil evil book done?... I mean, people is ok but cats! Oh no... and that Lodimo, he will haunt us sometime soon... we need to mend your Russian literature's deathly effects... This is gruesome! look at his paws... Maybe we could use Dalton rituals but but..." Then the girl had a very good idea. "I know! You know? I remember this Jesus guy was turning wine into piss the other day on a park... and and If he could transform that heavily complex and contaminated chemicals into Dionysus fluids, he must know how to turn a heart on. A poor aliencat heart." He agreed and took the sleeping cat in his arms and off they go in the search of mighty Jesus.

After an unfruitful 2 hours long search through all Helsinki and after a lake flooded suddenly and drowned 58 in a horrible and assphyxiating death, they finally came across Jesus' new headquarters. It was a big building made of pure gold and it shined like a bedroom lamp, it had a line of still-alive people waiting to get in and witness how Jesus turned raw shit into Caviar. He would share out later they said. The two poets finally had an audience with Jesus himself and the bearded one asked "Hi hi! Um, You may remember us... we were together for some time but now you have started a business... and and now we are in dire need of help. This cat... he died accidentally and we need to wake him up somehow... this is really important... and..." Jesus scratched his beard "Ha!... I see. Well this is a very common request, you know.. all that death satan puts us through is really unjust and wearisome.. and even though it goes against the very basic fabrics of creation's mechanics, I can ask my daddy if he can do something for your fluffy. It is going to take a 6 weeks delivery though..! plus taxes..." They agreed because they didn't know what else to do. They put the cat into a Resurrection box and they signed a 6 months payment-contract. Only 99.99 per month it said. They hugged Mr Jesus goodbye and they were out on the streets, with nothing else to do but wait and watch the stars.

But in a little cafe shop, a man was drinking his strong coffee very weirdly. Looking all around. He was very black and when he saw the other two, he jumped towards them. "VOJNE!!" he screamed with a very weird accent "Well, Lodimo Lodimo, that is my name and...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

-"What, what, you Earth-Cretins, what have you done to my Karl516."
-"Your Karl516 is by our Jesus. No, not in heaven, but in his new repair-shop on Sibeliusstreet. He had a little intence meeting with a Russian lady Anna and maybe luckily not with the Karamazov brothers," said the poet and tried to look selfconfident.
-"Bla, bla, don't try that with me, you hircine. I have had telphatic contact with Karl516 and he told me that you are violent gangster that kill everything you can. You need to be reproved on my ship."
And before the girl even could blink, the two had disappeared.
On the ship was a torture-chamber where black-black Lodimo7 put electronical devices everywhere on the poet.
-"So you have seen "Clockwork Orange". said the poet boldly, "And I can expect some van Ludwig now?"
-"Oh you have seen that movie," Lodimo7 was surprised. "Did you like it?
Now started an animated discussion about movies and Lodimo7 asked what the poet thought about his Excessa-revolution.
-"I think it is great, said the poet. I hate that scoundrel Pekka-shit and he needs a good spanking.
-"Jajaja, haha, spanking is just what he shall have," laughed Lodimo7 and started to sing.

Spank, spank, Bruederlein, spank,
Lass doch die sorgen on drill,
We use some whips, we use some vasps,
Make it so painful we will,
Make all his leben ein kill,
Spank, spank, for Pekka, it's still,
going nill...

The poet sang from his heart and Lodimo7 took away the electrodes.
-"You are a funny guy, and now I will give you a full dose of anti-violent-vaccine and you will be like a white little lamb. From now on there will be no more 26-killings.
-"Gosh,it will be strange," said the poet."Will I rape dogs and shit rainbows again then?
-"No, and no more relapses in gayness either...

Boom kaboom they were back on the earth again.
BUT THERE WAITED...

[AGAG]

the girl and a long lost friend, Pekka Nurmi who now held her hands with a delicate touch and with the delicate reading of a poem he attempted to numb her senses into a trance. Lodimo and the poet gauged the situation carefully and they watched and heard in the distance.

"Oh, delicate Ö's
that fall up and then through
and, oh, so low
like a stomach and it's food.
Or a soft brown plow
through the cleanest of loos.
Excessa is asleep without your hair
and soon it will be Valentine's day.
And...
No matter what they say
They are actually gay
Let me take you home, today
and together we will meet our fate
It is not too late
and our souls are the perfect mates.

Observe the plains
Not even a Layne could wash away.

And then... we would brake the cage
We could be the little sheep
that roam over the poem's page,
as if they were looking for a place to sleep."

The scene was beautiful and all Helsinki sighed at the same time at the sound of Pekka's melodious voice. Lodimo was upset "He is evil" he said "I have seen this countless of times from my ship. That girl is a key in his evil plan and he will not rest until her brain is completely washed. But you smashed Karl and now we cannot start a revolution..." Then the poet answered "Oh I know... this is like a neverending cartoon in the back of a milk carton. The birds will turn into arrows and soon it will be night again... If I had only one more post, or that Anna Karenin in my hands once more..."

But the girl was already light as a hair in the strong arms of Fucking and and...

[AGAG]

And lodima looked shocked at the e-mail in the cellphone that had internet connection features. "We have failed" he said almost with alien tears on his eyes and with that perpetual weird accent "Karl, oh, karl. He had the weapons and the militari knowledge to fight Pekka but now it is too late, he has achieved his key weapon and now Helsinki is powerless and soon the world. El Salvador ranked high on the list.". "But but.." said the poet "We don't give up this easily. We can get another Karenin, it is still noon and there's a library just around the corner... hell! we could even get a War and Piss collectors edition and fight to death." But lodimo was reluctant "Oh no, oh no... that would not work. Let us better enjoy our freedom while it lasts. Have, have... you ever thought about having intercourse with an alien? I heard you are good with dogs and.. it is basically the same thing because.." But the poet went away in the middle of the unfinished Mars-sex proposal, towards a library.

It was indeed a sad an windy sundae, maybe it missed it's cherry on the top or maybe it was the receptacle of a sad silver spoon on a mall. The poet arrived to the gigantic library and asked the smiling librarian. "Hello hello, I am looking for a thick book, preferably coated, that I could use to defend an alienkidnapped person. I thought about Russians but you probably know better." The librarian smiled and said "Oh yes, we have a lot of those. Look on floor 17, it is the alien floor and we have a lot of alien thick files there." And there went the running poet. There he found two persons who were on a heated discussion about alien music sitting on a table with seven books spread all around. "... Of course not! Aliens using our primitive perfect fifth based system! Haha! they could use dog shit and get the same results" said Bo, who was not pissing. "Ja, but you misverstand my point" Said the other funny looking guy "...aber cock! look who's hier, it is a rather agitated junge and he seems to know you!" He came and said "Hello, hello. I would gladly join the conversation but but... I'm on an important mission and I need a weapon, to fight aliens. He has kidnapped on of my dearest friends and now she seems to be alienwashed, he read a poem and then he had her brain gone." The german guy answered "Oh ja, naturlich, nothing better than helping an new Freund. Sit down and we will plan something, you need to calm down. My name, ja, it is Karl. But people call me Herr Stock." The salvadorean was surprised "Oh, Karl you said? I had a friend who had an accident. He was called like that. We took him over to Jesus and they were fixing him." "I know!" Said mr Stock "I was send on exchange. That arme Cat had too much with that Karenin and they just send a similar named person to cover up for him. Aber, up there on the heavens the other Karl told me his secrets. I can help you win diesen Krieg. You need to trust me." And they started to plan an attack. Önurmi and Nurmi were about to get married, so said the newspapers. And they had to intercept.

Gling-Gló, gling-gló made the bells. And Pekka held Ö in his strong finnish hands. They faced the Priest and they were on Helsinki's Jesus's gold chapel, the greatest one in town. The girl had a red dress and Karl and the poet thought she looked like a Rötkappchen. There were 1000 people sitted and Harvester4 was on the back with a cellphone in her hands. Bo made the distractions: He pissed on the altar like he had never pissed before. Then the new Karl instaled the speakers with the music, some Klavier Stucke. It began to play at horrendus volumes and the attendants were numbed. Some even vomited. Pekka was inmune but he wasn't fast enough so the girl had already vanished when he turned around.

Everyone wondered "What will happen now?" and and then...

[Hubble86]

AGAG!Do you know what to do?

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Don't worry, be happy. I am sort of back!


Mr Stuck turned up the volumes and the congregation closed their ears and eyes in pain and despair. The weather-vane on the churchroof started to cockarockarooo, something that never had happened before, and was taken as some bad, very bad omen.
Pekka tried to silence the speakers and the girl took her chance and sneaked out. The twins and mr Stock followed her and they ran to Jesus-repair-everything-broken on Sibelius-street. Jesus greeted them with open arms,-"Welcome my children, here you are safe for aliens. I have just made some wine so you can be really drunk".
Now started a big party and after a while even the poet and Lodima7 came. Kosmo was allowed to sing his Maria-Hill-song and was very happy. Jesus danced a minuet to Hubbles Coltrane-record and it was a shim and a blim. Everyone got very drunk.
The cat was healed and danced a cossack-step to Anna Kareninas honour. The poet was ashamed.
-"I am so sorry, but I am vaccinated now, so I can't even hit anyone with a thin pocket," he said.

But in another part of the city a furious Fucking rushed around after his run-away-bride. He had invited 999 guests to his wedding, that was meant to be the start of the invasion. Now that damn mr Stock had destroyed it all.
-"I will kill that German, said Pekka. "Germans, Germans, always Germans. Maybe they have gone to that German Jesus."
And he ran to Sibeliusstreet where there now had gathered a big crowd, since Jesus had started to make Koskenkorva instead of wine. All sang but no longer psalms or Maria-Hill-songs. The twins had an other repertory of very obscene songs.
Pekka was digusted when he tried to make his way among the bawling and hooting horde.
-"Huh! Drunken Finns are the worst," he thought. "Not a single one will be spared...But there was a boom-kaboom...

[AGAG]

Sort of? Are you still on Mars?

A flying bicycle just had stopped its home made engines in Sibeliusstret and it made boom and boom, not like a kalshinov. It was broken and the tape that was used to keep it together melted in a fiery fire. No one died, not even in a pretty way. It was one of the Hubbles and he stepped out into the party from his broken vehicle. "Oh, don't mind about my bicycle... we must celebrate" he said joyfully on top of the wreck "I have brought you, dear Helsinkians, a taste of my newest invention. Behold!.. After experimenting with the most rare of liquors and wines, I have come up with this Koskenkorva2... it is tasty and it has, you guessed it, 74.3% alcohol. It is almost lethal! Line up and then we'll party" And the crowd cheered and clapped as loudly as they could and they pushed each other to get a glass. Pekka bounced forth and then back in the crowd and almost assphyxiated. Then in a quiet land-island in the people sea, he formulated another one of his plans. He will not give up so easily and this is actually neverending so maybe he will never end aswell?. But he is on his way and on the Kosken2 barrels, he dropped a few drops of green liquid and no one noticed since they were bolting down copious amounts of alcohol... even Hubble was already drunk and was drinking regular and adulterated with no distinction whatsoever. Then it began. People were infected with the germ of love and in minutes in Sibeliusstreet took place Woodstock '11. People got naked and drank the liquor of love that was now Koskenkorva. Some people even took shits in specific areas of the streets, making sublime organic statues of Che Guevara and his friends. From somewhere came the Brittlegil and Boletus and the smoke rised from the crowds.. This was of course all according to Pekka's mastermind and he was now looking for the plaited girl who had never drunk a single drop of alcohol in her life. She was sober and watched how people danced at the sounds of the improvised trio that Hubble, Stock and Kosmo with his violin had formed. Finally through the dense cloud of love smoke, Pekka could finally catch a glimpse of the plaited in all her soberness. He ran and ran as he had seen a childhood dog in the distance and he promised a hug when he was 10 years old. He came to her and said "I see you and me both are the only sobers in this helltown... What do you say if we go to a not so mundane and obscene place? Say, we could look for cloverleaves in a flowerbed..." And she agreed because she was bored of Ro and Bo vomiting and pissing on top of each other non-stop for 45 minutes.

They were about to leave. But like a sudden bird that crashes on a window came a very drunk and bearded poet from inside a shit monument and he yelled...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

What a party!

-"Shit, shit, rainbowshit,I have never felt me so drunkhappy in all my life. This is a much better aberration, than with the best Salvadorian smoke. Sweet Jesus, you that blessed us with this gift to humanity, blessed be you yourself."
The girl and Pekka looked soberly at him.
-"He is as ruined as the others. He has stayed to long in this country and behaves more and more like a Finn. God help him!"
-"Kyllä, kyllä", mumbled the poet,"I love Finland but, but, I HATE freckled girls. I have cut her hair, made her pregnant with you Scoundrel, sent her to Excessa, given her to a bear and tried to drown her. And I still hate her. Go away to your planet and for Gods sake take her with you. Bah! Let me sleep now!"
He fell to the floor and the girl tried to help him.
-"Oh dear, oh dear! Vojne, what shall we do with him. I had no idea he HATED me so...
Pekka looked thoughtful.
-"I wonder", he said,"This green thing I brought here. I don't know how it interacts with Jesus's Kosken. It was meant to be some Woodstock-2-drug and make them all lovecrazy and promiscuous, but now it seems that it has the opposite effect. Look how they fight!
And what a sight it was!
Kosmo and mr Stock hit each other with their instruments and Kosmo's old fiddle was thread over Stockens head. Kosmo had a drum around his neck and his bawls made a very good sonourus echoing. The twins was fighting as usual, but made a mistake when they attacked Jesus. He had godly powers and knocked them both with a silver-cross. Öhubble had noone to fight, so he knocked himself out.

Pekka was inspired and made two limericks.

In Jesus's shop for mending,
There was a small descending,
From love to disgust,
In a blink of a gust,
They all themselves must defending.

There was some screams and bonebreaking,
From all that had greendrops been taking,
They made killingblows,
And soon there lay rows,
Of those that as wildbeast could be faking.

-"Oh dear Pekka you are a limerickmaker. Oh I love limericks. I once know one of the best in Seattle but he...
She started to weep again and will soon be called weepgirl,-"Everyone but you Pekka hates me...
But now the poet on the floor opened his rosy eyes and Boom Kaboom...

[AGAG]

his violence germs woke up from the artificial vaccine prison that kept them calm and asleep and they invaded his bowels and stomach in a rush. Then his poet cells had risen in his pancreas which is their lonely prison and invaded most of the pulmonary alveolus aswell. The alcohol awakened both of them. They were both headed to the heart and they longed for total control of his thoughts and dreams... A war was about to unleash in his circulatory system since they were both heading to the veins and then the hearh. The leukocytes couldn't fathom or face the amount of hippie poet cells that entered in thousands from the splenic vein and all seemed happy from the main arteries, not a single violent one in sight. And they were about to win the heart race, they were already cheering and writing blood poems.. but surprise surprise, after the violent cells made a scheduled stop in the liver to get some of the still non-purified kosken, they clashed mercilessly with the peaceful ones and a bold war began near the Pituitary. The violent side was cold blooded and used tricky means to seize complete power. They had protein bazookas in their hands and many kalashnikovs that fired erythrocytes at unbelievable speeds against the bearded poets that fought the best they could. But poor them, they were outnumbered by the violents that diarreically sprouted from the splenic, all well armed and ready to kill. Many long haired fell from the first booms of the bazookas and the leukocytes saw the beards as a threat and they provided long anti-germ cannons against them.

From a cold trench in the carotid, the leader of the poets smoked a pipe with his best soldiers, his name was Rob and he was sad. "It is always the same.." he said "We tried in leeds, then in germany. We try now in helsinki and we always fail the heart race. Poetry and happiness is dead. We should have brought Kareninnas into this fight.. we always end up coloring the feces of some man.. Oh god! I don't want to be eaten by a dog in the sewers again! Oh no!" one loyal soldier answered him heartily. "Sir!..Then... Then we will fight! we will maybe die in this carotid or maybe in the aorta. But we will fight, until our system's adenosine triphosphate stop flowing like rivers from our strong mithocondrias.. Oh no! We will not stop until our ribosomes suicide and our protein ceases being peptide or maybe dipeptide. And and! Surely! we will not before our Golgi apparatuses fold our wastes unto the oblivion of the rebate of our microscopical film-life and our endomembrane gets golgi-free.... never before we will surrender! Them!... they can take our ribonucleics as much as they want but they will never get even near of our nucleolus!" And then Rob was crying. His beard was bold and stronger than never before.

And they blasted out of their trench heroically against the crowds and clouds of booming kalashnikovs with only a few T cells as friends. They yielded small pocket poem books as weapons and protein complexes as rods to hit and slash. And the battle was fierce with 1.5 million against just 20,000.. and they lost many, and after some booms and the heart's boom and bun as background music, the violents were reduced up to just 100,000 and the poets just with 200. It was sad. In the oustide world, the poet was drunk and midst pendulating episodes of pure poetry and raw violence. But inside, rob was injured... an angry platelet hit him hard in the head all of a sudden. All seemed lost for the poets and they were cornered and trapped in a little palmar digital arthery. They wouldn't give up no matter what. There come the angry hordes of blood thirsty V-germs.. but something happened in the outside...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

God, where have you been lately?

The lecosytes followed by the aggressive V-germs jumped out of the drunksnoring poets mouth, with every outbreath he took, since his inbreathes not had enough oxygen, for them to survive.
The bloodplasma was so diluted with Koskenkorva and one could estimate the proportions to 50/50 water-alcohol and all the platelets were hiding in the vein-nooks in his arse. It was a dangerous condition and the girl saw the blue colour in his face and the green-yellow V-Germs leap around on the floor.
-"He has problem with his oxygenintake", she said. "We must give him mouth to mouth and heart-massage. I take the heart if you give him the kiss of life."
And Pekka started the mouth to mouth and it was rather touching to see how gentle he was. The girl was more brutal in her heartbumping. She was angry over the poets earlier hatedeklaration and thought that he needed some bashing.
They got result. The poets face was less blue and the legosytes stayed in his veins for more work. The V-germs crawled on the floor. Homeless! Looking for a new victim. But they needed moist and Jesus shopfloor was dry as Shaharas sand, so they died one by one.
The poet awakened slowly and foggy. Gosh, gosh and vojne vojne. He had the freckled girl hammering his chest and...What....Huuuuuuu...Pecka kissing him tenderly...
-"This can't be," he thought, "It must be an horrible gay-ninghtmare. But, but. Am I gay? Again? Pekka and me? Huu. Is this my destiny? What evil can I have done to deserve this? The dogs? The poor streetdogs? Pekka and me...Nooooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuu help,helpihelpi...
Boom kaboom....

[AGAG]

Oh, you always find new things and I'm always the victim

The lying-down drunk poet acknowledged his powerlessness against his destiny and decided to accept this new gay-stage and embrace it the best he could. "And whom of all man had to thread through and introuduce my lips into this homoworld" He tought "Pekka! of course... a gift from god itself" And he accepted this and he lifted his hands from the V-germ infested ground and stroked Pekka's hair gently. At first like a breeze that gently lends a tree caressing all its leaves and then as a strong tide that fights against the beach's rocks. And then the kissing became stronger and the stroking a bit more violent. But pekka didn't fight at all. The drunk didn't need more heart pumping since he did have a lot of spare oxygen available now, and from the best source he could find. The girl stepped back as the floor scene unfolded and then it folded again in a lovely cycle of love and doves. "Gosh.." she thought "Now I really have nothing to do here!.. everyone has fell pray of dionysus or maybe other greek gods. What an interesting night! yes yes... not every day you can see two men wallowing in shit while kissing each other. I better take notes." Indeed everyone was either fighting to death or loving to death or shitting to death except for the girl who was the purest parenthesis in this crowd. Pekka and the drunkpoet now stood up and now they were making poems to each other. "Oh, I never thought how great this could be." said pekka "It is indeed like an alien heaven, I will never leave you" And then the poet made a poem

"Your hands
Made of sapphire
Your glands
Oh, gentlest of lyres

Where is your left hand now?
has it stuck in my hoosegow?
Let us liberate it
the world will backbit
Butt we will both prevail
In a hotel
with a cocktail."

And swoosh, there they go, hand in hand. Hubble and Kosmo clapped in the distance at the beautiful sight of love and passion. But the girl, she said:...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Yes! poor you! haha!

-"Oh dear, oh dear! Why is there only homos in my life nowadays? Pekka has always been bi, though. He stole my ugly-birdie-muffin once. But my best friend, how could he? And the poet! Why does he suddenly hate me so?"
She decided to leave an almost demolished Jesus-shop and all the half-unconscious guys that lay shattered all around.
On her way out, she met Lodima 7 and the cat Karl516. They had heard what had occurred and Lodima7 smiled happily,-"That was great", he said, "my vaccinationplan worked perfectly. I gave the poet a love-Pekka-hate-Freckled-dose and he reacted as he should. The big Kosken-consumption was a problem though, and I am glad you saved his life. Again!
-"No big deal. I love to save lives, even if the one I save hates me. But, what did you say? It was you that made him so angry at me? With your vaccine? Does that mean, that he doesn't hate me so much after all? Really?? Oh dear! I am so happy. He may still be my best friend".
The girl became weep-girl. Again!
-"Jaja", Lodima7 was impatient, "We must take the bubble and visit mr Nurmis goatfarm,while he is in your friends arms. We are in a hurry!"
On the farm Lodima7 stole computers and strange instruments, that blinked and blipped. The girl had never seen anyting like them, but Ludima7 seemed to be familiar with the technic and they took it all to the girls house.
-"Now we shall reprogramme everything and this can save the world. We shall also mobilize our troups on Excessa",said Ludima7 and started one of the Blippers.
In a hotelroom not so far away, the poet was foggily awakening. Again! He was very, very thirsty and confused. But what was even worse! He had lost his memory.-"What in the burning redhot hell am I doing here? With the naked scoundrel. Glimpses of embarrasing episodes flashed through his tired brain and he closed his eyes. What, what, what, Huh, huh,huh...Boom Kaboom.

First it was like a breeze,
That gently lends a tree caressing,
All it's leaves,
And then a strong tide,
That fight against the beach's stronger.
Where was his left hand now?
In a hotel wit a cock tail.

(This is a recycled poem, written by the poet himself)

He thought for a while and then...

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Hallo! Hallo! here we have a real poem written by a real poet. Who can that be? A Schiller? A Goethe? Well done. Let us hear more of that sort.

First it was a breeze.......

[AGAG]

More like a Schneller

OH yes, it was a breeze. A breeze in a cold morning because he was barefoot and barenaked. OH the hotel was pretty and it had the loveliest of curtains, he thought. OH but I know! I will hop and jump and I will go to my friend's house that lies next to where the rainbows begin their flight through the skies. OH, that Pekka! all my clothes are gone and here I am at a freezing temperature, imagine what my body would like if I try to walk through the blizzard with nothing at all. OH, I better use this sock and it will keep warm all the way. And there he went, with nothing but a sock somewhere on his body and he walked 19 miles in the freezing morning. Until, Oh, he arrived to his friend's house. And the rainbow was full blown and the sock was torn. Oh hi hi! She said. I see you are wearing just a sock, please sit on my expensive furniture and tell me all about it. And, oh, he did. He told her everything about that sock that had saved his life on the toughest cold. OH, you are my best friend and I always think of you even when I am in motels and I don't have a lot of writing time... and I don't know what to do now, he said crying, I cannot use quotes now and I cannot remember what happened in that cozy apartment... all that I remember: OH, the curtains are beautiful. And you are a good friend and I will ask: Tomorrow is a special day for Pekka and do you think I look better with a green or a transparent skirt for him?. And the girl knew exactly what to do, in this breezy morning she went to her special shelf and...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Barnaked! Nice word!


-her recordshelf.-"Jaja dear, I have something here for a Barnaked guy. Keith Jarrett "No moon at all" and every tone will float in through your ears, follow the bloodstream in your veins and give you all the warmth and comfort you need."
The poet was sceptic.
-"I had hoped that you could find me something to cover my barnakednASS. I am freezing cold in my ragged sock."
The girl blushed-"Sorry, you can have my best Stratoshirt, with the puking elk and some chinos that Chong left when he was helped down the stairs. But first a warm bath and hot honey-tea.
The poet got a foaming bubblebath and while he enjoyed it, he felt a bit dizzy. He thought about Pekka. Why had he followed him to the hotel? Wasn't he a scoundrel? Or not? And why had he said those nasty things to his best friend. Did he really hate her sometimes? And why in that case?
The girl handn't yet told him about Lodima7 and the vaccin, but now the poet suddenly knew. He could hear her in his head just as she thought that she must tell him.
-"What the fuck, I can hear what she thinks. Help what is this?"
The girl was building a logfire when she heard what the poet thought. At the same time! She dropped the logs and rushed into the bathroom.
-"Oh dear, I can hear your thoughts and I realize that you can hear mine. This is really scary."
-"Yes," the poet was shaken. "I knew that you should say just that. What is this?"
-"I am sure it is Pekka, Lodima 7 or Karl the cat. They have power over us now and we are their slaves. Alienslaves! We must fight them."
-"But, but, how?"
-"We have to ask father...
-"Ja, but last time I saw him he was piss-drunk with Rob and Bob and he can hardly be of any use. And to tell the truth, I like when we are in my head...
-"In YOUR head? No no we are in MY head...
They looked at each other and laughed. AT THE SAME TIME. And the laugh echoed and rebounded in the whole house. HAHAHAHAHAHA.................

But Boomkaboom. The door flew open and in came...

[AGAG]

A very handsome and strong Pekka with new hair and a gorgeous German windjacket. "Hallo" he said, freezing both of the mind transvestiers with a beautiful finish accent "I couldn't stop thinking about you. OH nein... I have become bored of Harvie and Excessa... now I come to you and I will not leave you forever". "OH finally" thought both of them And they started to kiss passionately. But but... who? "This is my head!... He is kissing ME" Said one. "Haha! No, look, this are my lips and his hands are on MY neck"... "Oh this is a riddle!" thought the other.

Ón a not so far away land, Lodima watched all with a remote control butterfly. "OH no!" He said, while pulling his black head's hair on and off. "This is not according to our plan. Pekka wasn't supposed to interfere... we were ready to mix the two poets in a brain soup and create a super human full of hatred towards Pekka to win the war, the intergalactic pekka war.. But oh no he is smart. He has created a paradox and now he is kissing one of them, maybe both at the same time since he is barbaric and unpredictable." Karl was upset, he wanted revenge for the Kareninna incident and couldn't wait to shove a War and Piss up the poet's throat. Lodima had recruited Hubble who was not so drunk any longer. He said, while writing on a white board "Oh yes, a plan now... Those two are really something! They can read minds and they now pendulate all around.. We need to enter the brains, oh yes, I also know a lot of neurochemie. We need to abduct them first. Then we will put them, yes, in a room with milk, cakes and a warm ground and of course a lot of chemically altered chocolate. I will take care of that, yes. In this environment for about three years, YES, their minds will melt together like two metal rods in a pizza oven. OH YES. And then we will have what you are looking for. And I!... I will have enough money for another soprano. YES YES and YES!" He was euphoric. Lodima agreed heartily and they all hopped on the alien tank that was bigger than a water bottle castle towards the girl's house. On the street they crushed cars and little dogs indiscriminately. Then they arrived and they rammed the tank against the girl's house, breaking the front wall in half and entering the main room through one side wall and with a big boom noise. Pekka stepped back and the girl did too. "Shit, shit, shit...!!" She said "Gosh, Fush, fuck!" she said again, from one of both minds. "Was that really necessary? NUUUU..." Lodima stepped down and cleaned off the dust from his black shirt. He always wore those. "Oh, haha... Um, don't worry this is not important in this precise instant. I have an endless money account and I will get all of your furniture back again... Butt! Pekka here is a bad bad man and I will have to sort of abduct both of you into confinement. Don't you think this is a logical conclusion? Of course you do." And then Karl shot elephant tranquilizers to both of them that fell asleep in a swish. The poet received the shot near the butt.

And swish... Pekka was gone and gone and they both woke up in a room full of cakes, warm milk and a blank notebook with a couple of pencils that were made of chocolate. "This seems like an igloo" they both thought and...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Now they are two poors!

Kyllä! An igloo it was, but not of snow. No, of brown cardboard, and the girl remembered, that she had seen something like that before. In Seattle. And in happier days!
-"What? Are we thinking of the muffinbaking seducer? Again? I thoughr we left that behind."
The girl looked sad.-"This is hopeless. You can see all my secrets and dreams and I know about yours. And please, stop the longing for Fucking. Everything is his fault".
He took her in his arms,-"Vojne, vojne. I am so sorry! Can we? Would we?"
-"No, we have to wait. It is not the right time for that. No not yet!"
-"But, but, we are so cold. And hungry for... At least I am. Are you not?"
-"Oh dear, fosh, gosh, if you can't delay it so okey...
And they picked up the thermos and the cheesesandwich's that Lodima7 had left for them.
It was cold and they could hear the wolves in the distance.

-"Let us make a hole in the igloo, dear Poet, dear Poet, a hole in the igloo, a hole and get out.

-"With what shall we make it? Dear Freckle, dear Freckle. With what shall we make it? With what?

-"We try the ignore-button, dear Poet, dear Poet, we try ignorebutton, we try that...

And puffkaboom, it worked!The igloo disappeared and they were back in Helsinki.
-"Great", they thought, "now we must be ourselves again. This is insufferable. We sort of love each other but this is just too much. We must go to the institution for neuro-chemical-brain-disturbances-through-mindreading.
A docent Yogasaki Neotry from Japan met them in the door. He had heard some rumours about their mental powers and was very intrigued. He took bloodsamples from them and so that happened that never should have happened. He had a little open scratch on his arm and just there fell a drop of the poets blood.
The neodisturbing aminoacid rushed to the neochemist's brain and snipsnap he could hear what the two thought.
-"What a japanese idiooot, bloodsamples? Haha! We are sure he is a complete jerk and doesn't understand a rainbowshit...
Docent Yogasaki Neotry from Nagoya, Japan, fainted...

And boomkaboom...

[AGAG]

Ignore button! So that's where it all hides.

An explosion demolished the lecture room. And the three melted into a same body-recipient misteriously after the building crumbles tumbled over them. It was amazing and inexplicable at first, maybe it was all Lodima's good plan. Or maybe evil. In the new recipient, they were the ingredients of a new happy human cheesecake that boiled on a big pot of water, or so they thought. It was, yes, a big white room with no furniture and no windows: a sugary mind apparently. And the three of them were trapped, oh, no oak doors or holes on the floor. And this was an entirely different skin so no ignore buttons for Helsinki teleportations. "What can we do here?" Asked the poet "This is a mind and we have to make it function. But what does a mind do? It defecates thoughts! Oh yes. So we must defecate." But the girl stopped him "No no! this is not what we must do. WE need to think clearly and evaluate all the situations before we perform a well thought plan. Fortunately we have Mr Yoganeo from Nagoya and he will help us." But oh, she had forgotten, he only spoke japanese and some cantonese so he was babbling in his language and he couldn't help at all. He smiled all the time and looked very enthusiastic but couldn't understand the nagoyian accent. They even tried sign language but to no avail. "Well. It is up to us" And the room oscillated like a 5.6 degrees earthquake, gentle enough to wake you up in the morning.

"Oh, we must act quick.." "Rum brum boom swoosh..." "What is that?" "Um.. Comet... comet!" "A comet comes? Should we run?" "Can we run? We are in a room" "No, it is a comet song. Enjoy!" "No. Of course not... just a little tectonic mind shake " "We are on a mission and it hurtles down, on this plot of mind" "Look at that light, yes! We should ask for a wish.. I wish for a cheesecake right now" "Is that you or me talking?" "Haha.. I don't know! Everything is so white.. and where has HE gone? Has he pulled his dark hat over the eyes?" "He is sad" "Oh you speak like a japanese" "Oh yes, a little. I come from Flamboya, Japan. This is my hat. His name is..." "I thought you couldn't.." "Speak? Oh yes I can... and I come from El Salvador... "Um. what is this sight? We must travel, swim and move. We cannot stay in this room. Look it is nothing but a big mountain" "Yes... a big mountain with no edges whatsoever" "Ha! Made of snow. And I have no coat... But I have my hat! And I can pull it down my eyes so I don't SEE any of the snow." "It is cold.." "Oh gosh! Poor you." "No. Poor us..." "We have walked for 2 days now. Shouldn't there be a cliff somehwere?" "Days?" "Look, a city" "Cee-tee?"
"Haha?"
"Oh no... you see. This is a mind... and we're now playing the role of the neurones. It may be a little weird at first... you'll get used to it" "Who are you?" "Oh I am a fourth one... just, um. Follow me! ha! Trust me" "Huh... it sounds a little suspicious" "... Suspicious? where the FUCK is my cheesecake?" "Eat snow. It will taste good. He looks white" "I look white. It is because of the snow." "There is snow on my hat" "And also there on that building.. oh that machine looks dangerous. It is printing." "Oh yes, it prints comets. Comets of thought" "We have those in japan! haha!" "This is like torture.. it mashes those books way too violently." "I am the operator and it is very nice to meet you. You will work here now. If you don't we will disconect you haha!" "Why does he laugh..?" "Oh! I am scared... this reminds me of 1944" "What happened in 1924?" "Oh, nothing too serious. Um I forgot I had a cheesecake in my fridge and it stayed there for six months." "Yummy" "IF I lifted my hand right now, we could be birds. And we could look at life in the rain with the commodities of spectators" "Yes, we need a window" "Let us sit... I am tired of this smell! Yuk yuk." "How many of us there are?" "Seven! I am the eight?" "Oh freckl... where are you?" "NO no... Where is MY Schiescake" "This is too much.." "This is too Soup! hahaha! because we are in a soup. Where is your sense of humor? A soup that powers the mill... a soup that lifts the will... a soup of thought! Oh yes, let us dance" "NO no... I have had it! I will destroy this all." "Boom bum?.." "Yes... you will have your cheesecake. Oh, until you fall in love!" "BOOM I say... BOOM I say..."

And boom it was heard... and then it was, oh, so quiet.

And then. It was a computer screen that made bip bip. And and...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

The end.

In the room came Pekka Fucking. Boom Kaboom he smashed the screen.
-"Enough of this! You have made a real rainbowshitneuronsoup of this and now you have to boil in it.. You have no longer free wills and you have to obey the big Alienbody where you are small cells. This neverending story has been told so all the world have to learn how it ends when we take over. You are now neouroslaves and there is no reason, what so ever to talk about you any longer. You are totally uninteresting like separate cells in a big body, like ants in a stack. But one of you I will save for me. She will be my antqueen. I love freckles and come here freckled girl.
And he fished up the girl from the cellsoup. She wept.
-"But, but, my friend. He is not a neutron. He is a poet...
-"Jaja, it was that gay gay on the hotel. Jaja I will send him back to El Salvador where he can take care of his/mine five daughters and his wife Nelia Alien. And now let us go to the bubble.."
-"But, but, is the story about me and the poet at the end now?
Yes!
Boom Kaboom...

[AGAG]

It was a soup and the two poets were powerless against the breakfast giant. One in the spoon, one in the bowl. "Who will save us now?.. will he swallow me? Oh I am scared..." thought the weeping girl. At the realization that the end that was near, the bowl-poet said to the girl "Oh well! I have a confession to make... I sort of... have been listening to a lot of Jarrett lately. I think more than evans. And and... I thought you would like to know that... and and Good luck!" And there she went first line to the trachea tour. The bowl poet thought he could stay and weep for the lost of his friend, but oh no, pekka was really hungry and he ate the whole in a single bite with no scrupulosity, so he even ate the ceramic bowl without chewing. It was his breakfast meal and he was quite unreflexive. After a short trip and a brief visit to the lungs, the bowlie splashed on top of a semi-digested sushi bar quite harshly. There he was, swimming in green liquids until he climbed on top of a mämmi floating mountain. There he could think clearly and he tried to get his thoughts together. I am alive so she must be alive, he thought.. And he began looking everywhere. Swimming and singing to keep his spirit with enough strenght. Through a pizza meadows, through the waterfalls of alcohol-free finnish beer, through the cliffs of doughnuts.. But nowhere to be found. He sat sad in a floating apple. But he still sang... "Fly me to the moon... in other words let me sing forevermore!". Oh and it echoed through all the toraxic cavity and it served as a siren alarm. From the distance came a light. A freckled light. and she swam until she could climb on top of the apple. They hugged and the girl wept no more. We must get out of this beautiful body, she said. Oh but we will eventually! It is a natural process and we just need to wait for expulsion. Suggested the poet. But the other poet knew more about the stomach and it's acids and she had a better idea...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Perkele 9000. I had just written a long post when the devil from my workcomputer jumped into this one and erased it all. Satana perkele and I don't remeber what I wrote so i have to do it later. Now I must read things for tomorrow Piss shitpiss again. See you...

[AGAG]

Don't worry that sort of happens. And yes, see you!

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Here we go again!

Since Pekka in frustration, over their escape, made them to small neurondots, they now sat perched on an applepiece in Pekkas stomach. The girl saved them from just that in the last chapter, but the poet couldn't accept to be transported to his unfaithful alienwife, Nelia, and his and Pekkas five daughters. So he rather met an uncertain future, in the neuronsoup, in Pekkas breakfast.
The girl understood him, because she had no particular wish to be a freckled alienwife on Excessa. So after a few seconds of considerations, she jumped after him, into the cerealbowl.
Now they were together again, in a new adventure that seemed to be very dangerous. They were smallsmall neurons trapped in brutal Pekka Fuckings digestive system, with all the chemicals that easily could cost small neurons their lives. Worst was maybe the strong stomachacid that trickled out from glands in the gastric mucosa. They had already started to splash fluids close to their little appleresort.
-"I have in my pocket a little flask, with the drug psilocobin and I will put it on one of his specially weak spots for best effect", said the girl, "It will go direct to the bloodsystem and he will feel very strange and get hallucinations."
After two minutes there was some disturbance and jumping about. The stomach reacted violently and turned inside out. Urk urk. The two followed the applepiece up, up, through a long corridore, into some echoing cave, with big Pekkateeth.
Poff urk. Again. This time they flew out on the floor and a booming voice said huhuhuhuuu in Finnish. They ran as fast as their small neuronlegs could bear them, to avoid the threatening mop that soon would scoop them up, and crept under a carpet, where they tried to be as still as possible. They heard the booming Pekka complain over gastric pains, desorientation and bad Finnish bear. They laughed in all their misery.
But they were so small, so small, and their laugh was even smaller, so noone heard them.
The boomer went away and now they must try to leave the neuron-existence and be normal again. The poet said he had an idea and the girl thought it would serve him right, to take them out of this neuronsoup, since it was he that had put them there. So she said with some sarcasm,"Yes dear, I hope it is a good and practical one this time,and not so poetical as it uses to be..."
-"Hrmmm, jaja, why don't we...

[AGAG]

just drink this potion your father gave me! Is this non-poetical enough? I have been keeping it on my front pockets all the time like you do with that pscilosibin but but.. I love digestive systems and neurones and I couldn't waste my opportunities to be in such beautiful bowels." The girl, who loved adventures, agreed it was the soundest choice and they swallowed the potion of normalness, a green liquid that tasted like sweat. They went out and climbed a little snowball that lied on a side of the Pekka shed and they waited and waited for the neurone transformation to begin. But they were two little neurons and they were freezing and nothing happened. "Gosh" she said "Do you have more of that liquid? I'm beginning to get worried my father didn't put enough garlic in it" And they both drank the whole bottle in a swoosh. Burb and blurp, but what now? They were both starting to feel dizzy but not in a innocent pscilosibin sort of way... They started to grow yes, but they also grew hair everywhere in a violent manner. They growled and growled and when it was over, they felt like never before. They looked at each other in awe, and they both popped a tail.. They were dogs now. The most beautiful they could be. They had paws and hair everywhere and their noses, they were covered in snow. She was a lovely white pedigree-maltese with two pink ribbons and a white long plait. He was a golden cocker spaniel with no pedigree but also with a big pink ribbon on his head. "Vof!..." She voffed "Vosh! my father is playing practical jokes on us once more. For voffs sakes..." The golden smiled and also voffed "Haha, vof! I can't say this is any less of a dream. Why the VOF do I have a pink big one though?.. We could enjoy it while it lasts! Let us get the voff out of here and get as far away from Pekka as we can." And they ran into the horizon, leaving their neurone past all behind in a breakfast bowl.

They went to the streets in Helsinki once more and they decided they were going to enjoy this probably-temporal canine state. They stole a long italian bread from a bread shop and they ate it voffing happily on an alley. They stormed inside a jazz club and climbed on-stage while the soprano sax was unravelling the room note by note. They got kicked out when the golden one bit the pianist hard in the crotch.. he had forgotten the correct use of tritones. They were on the street once more and then they went and ate pizza left-overs from an italian restaurant and they found Ro and Bo drunk and asleep on a park. They tried to wake them up but it was useless. They even pissed on both of them as if they were human hydrants but nothing happened at all. Then they paid a visit to Jesus temple. Jesus was on whistling on a bench, he had acquired 28% of Finland's GDP and he was happy as a son of God. He caressed them with his blessed hands and their hair was purified and blessed. "Go away my brothers. Shake your tails in the name of my scared papa! But please, away from my clean temple. I cannot clean dog shit with my hands... Here. Have a cracker" And they went away chewing the fat-saturated Jesus cracker. Then they went on a moving mountain and she said "Oh! this was fun, gosh. I never thought that having a tail and being able to use it as a fifth leg would be so nice." The poet had repented "Oh, now I see things from different eyes. I will not fuck these beautiful creatures again. I will let THEM fuck me which is sort of different.".. And the girl answered "Oh, whatever you like! haha. But we need to visit my father and return to the normal-normal state, um, but first I got an idea. I have to bite someone hard, now that I can get away with it! haha... this person is: ...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Vof, vof!


Oh dear, you could never guess!"
-"Pekka? No? But who? Tell me!"
-"Sorry, voffsie dear, but I will bite you! I have always disliked your dograping and now I can revenge all my misstreated relatives. I would gladly rape you a couple of times, if I had the right tool, but now I will bite you instead. Vof, vof! Bite! Bite!"
-"Ah! Oh! that was lovely! Do it again, please!
-"No, it was meant to hurt you, but okey it was rather fun so. Vof, vof, bite, bite! Again!"
-"But, but, what is happening now? I feel unnatural. My fur. My lightbrown silkfur is falling off and you, you look horrible."
-"Yes, I can see that I look like an armed shit. Oh, dear, we are suddenly two armadillos! I have never seen one live, only on Wikipedia."
-"Ja, I have also only seen pics. Our bodies are encased in small bony plates. And listen to our pianissimovoices, that didn't Wiki talk about."
-"Huu! This time my fathers jazz-practical-jokes have gone too far. We must confront him."
The two armadillos went to Nokia, but met problem at the entrance.
-"No strange animals can enter here", roared the doorkeeper.
-"But," said the girl in her pipish armadillovoice, "I am Öhubbles daughter and I want to see my father."
-" What? You can talk? One will hear much remarkable things here on Nokia before the ears fall off," said the uniformed man to a lookalike. "But this takes the prize of the day."
The men laughed, but one of them was slightly smarter than the other and was worried.-"Hei, that Öhubble has done a lot of odd things. Maybe he has invented somthing that can make animals of people. Huh, we better take them to him."
Öhubble, that was more distraught than ever, since Nokia was in trouble, had forgot all about his jazzjoke and he became very upset when he saw the two armadillos.-"What is this? I don't expect visitors and who are they? Have we affairs with Zoo now?"
-"But Father", cried the girl, "It is me. Can't you hear that it is me?"
-"HUHUH? Daughter? What are you up to this time? Have you become an animal, I don't even know the name on. How did you manage that? And who is the other one. The poet of course! You two are something"...
-"Jaja, we have been anything from smallsmall neurons to this and now we only want to be ourselves again."
Öhubble looked at them and suddenly he seemed to remember. Something! But what...