Stratovarius Community

I was googling for interviews&found this. Actually, I don't know what to think---yet, I could not help but laugh at some of it. Was it wrong to laugh? You tell me.....


http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Stratovarius

Uncyclopedia is the parody version of Wikipedia. Everyone can write nonsense there just for laughing the readers.

So, its ok, then. I didn't know if it was being smartass or funny. I hate sarcasm. But, like I said I didn't know whether to laugh or be offended because some of it was really funny.
I think the StratoGuys have a sense of humor so its alright, I guess.

I love that site. My favourites are:

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Dio
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Heavy_metal
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Satan

browneyedgirl wrote:So, its ok, then. I didn't know if it was being smartass or funny. I hate sarcasm. But, like I said I didn't know whether to laugh or be offended because some of it was really funny.
I think the StratoGuys have a sense of humor so its alright, I guess.

Same here. I don't usually like that sort of thing because it can get pretty insulting and is often totally false, but I must confess, some of this WAS pretty damn funny. I hope no one minds any of the bs being copied here, but this had me cracking up.

Sratovarius earned great success with their albums “Manic Episode” and “Wisions”, which took them to such countries as South America and for the first time for any Finnish metal band – Japan. A reported “Beatlemania” occurred when the band reached the Latin countries. Fans flocked from every direction, clawing at the members, most of which wanted to touch the god Jens Johansson and possibly acquire some narcotics and alcohol.

The band was so revered by the South Americans that they were permitted to piss freely in the streets and drink an endless supply of free beers. They also willingly trashed hotel rooms, made fun of the natives, and took hours of shoddy amateur footage. Soon after their departure, the inhabitants of Sao Paolo noticed the conspicuous presence of new rivers, which coincidentally have no definite origin.

Poor Jens. That site sliced&diced him, but he is usually a good sport, so I guess its OK.

browneyedgirl wrote:Poor Jens. That site sliced&diced him, but he is usually a good sport, so I guess its OK.

WHAT !?!?!?!? they insulted jens? Now they must die.... hahahahaha

:) wrote:

browneyedgirl wrote:Poor Jens. That site sliced&diced him, but he is usually a good sport, so I guess its OK.

WHAT !?!?!?!? they insulted jens? Now they must die.... hahahahaha

Yes, but in a good-natured way, I suppose. Read it for yourself if you have time.

Considering that only big bands are even mentioned in Uncyclopedia the guys should be "honored" that they got a full biography. Of course some of it was pretty fuckin rude (and hilarious) but it is quite complete.


IMO Lauri (Sperm) got off worse!

stratoplayer wrote:Of course some of it was pretty fuckin rude (and hilarious) but it is quite complete.


IMO Lauri (Sperm) got off worse!

Yeah, I liked specially what it was written ´bout Lauri Sperm. That was so hilarious that I nearly choked my laugh.

fuckin christ...

I couldnt help but laugh...its freaking hilariuos cause if you know anything about the band you know every single word in the thing is pulled out of someones arse And its done in a way I think is just jerk-your-chain kind of humor....no harm no foul

Throw the jew down the well.... so my country can be free....

hm, IMO that article is not as funny as it could be. I could imagine writing much funnier stuff about our famous scandinavian-german alliance. But the uncyclopedia-thing is pretty kewl, hehe.

"STRATOVARIUS settled for Jens Johansson, a mediocre and inexperienced keyboardist who specialized in computers and drug trafficking"

Haha that has to be the best bit!

Bathory Killcraft wrote:"STRATOVARIUS settled for Jens Johansson, a mediocre and inexperienced keyboardist who specialized in computers and drug trafficking"

Haha that has to be the best bit!

Heh, agree too!

Once came up to think what if also Jens has participated in giving some data to that Uncyclopedia description... At least the stories would fit well with jens-humour.

Drug trafficking?
In What?
Koskenkorva, chocolate truffles, and Cialis?

It was quite funny, not my type anyway.

Normal lowlever humor, laughable. THe worst part was "It's a fact that Lauri Porra can't play bass." Also the Jens stuf was really low. I really laughed at the Kotipelto-pornparts

Directly following the proclamation that the dynamics of the band were completely repaired, bassist Jari Kainulainen left the band in search of a more stressful and personally scathing career. His replacement – Lauri Sperm – is quite an ambitious choice, due to his lack of musical education or experience whatsoever.




The whole article is sidesplitting

Today, these modern gods of power metal are living the true life of metal. The era of sex, drugs, and rock and roll have obviously grown gauche, as members of STRATOVARIUS set the new trend of doing such metal things as raising families and drinking less.

I can't stop... laughing.... omg...

I saw that page before, I think it's hilarious. They have one for nightwish too.

Soon after their departure, the inhabitants of Sao Paolo noticed the conspicuous presence of new rivers, which coincidentally have no definite origin.

I haven't been around in a while, but I decided to stop by since there's lots of good things going on for the guys right now.

I wrote that flame article a while ago, but didn't share it with the forum because I was afraid it looked like I was just trying to show off. I'm glad some of you found humor in it and I'm sorry for any offense to you or the guys. I really am a huge fan of Stratovarius (and a Kotipelto fan, if you can't tell). I tried to be tasteful with it, especially because of what happened with Tolkki, as we all know. I did do it as a "tribute" for them because they are such respectable musicians and nice people in general.

It could have been written better for sure! So, why don't you guys try, too? I had a blast doing it last summer. =)

- M

@Shadowed, you have a great sense of humor&terrific writing style.
I salute you! *high5*

A wonderful article to be sure!

Thanks to all of you for the comments! It means the world to me coming from you guys. I'm really beaming from the compliments! =)
And I understand if the humor is not for you - some of those articles are not my thing, either. Anyway, I'm glad it was read by fans. =)

- M

If it was you, then an excellent job. Funny, thought-provoking, but not disrespectful. Great satire!

shadowedaethyr wrote:I haven't been around in a while, but I decided to stop by since there's lots of good things going on for the guys right now.

I wrote that flame article a while ago, but didn't share it with the forum because I was afraid it looked like I was just trying to show off. I'm glad some of you found humor in it and I'm sorry for any offense to you or the guys. I really am a huge fan of Stratovarius (and a Kotipelto fan, if you can't tell). I tried to be tasteful with it, especially because of what happened with Tolkki, as we all know. I did do it as a "tribute" for them because they are such respectable musicians and nice people in general.

It could have been written better for sure! So, why don't you guys try, too? I had a blast doing it last summer. =)

- M

@Meg, hello!! I'm Fatima, Beauty_has_come from Koti´s forum.

The article is great, is really funny.

I read this article the first time two or three monts ago, and I just think "this article was writed for a big Stratovarius fan", and I was right!!

I love the part "Answering Tolkki’s ad, Kotipelto howled four notes that acted as an “audition” to which Tolkki reportedly said to then drummer Laslo, “I’ve heard all I needed to hear”, which falsely led Kotipelto to believe he was hired. This, unfortunately, led to be an awkward moment of Finnish courtesy where Tolkki entreated Kotipelto to sing for the band."

"Along with the Kabala, Tolkki professes that he is truly metal with influences such as Bach and Vivaldi. He is also a huge Madonna fan. I mean, huge."

Terrific

Now that i noticed this, I have to say that the song names could have been funnier, not all, but they should atleast have remade all song names, not just some.