Neverending Story [Game]

Here you can talk about Stratovarius and related bands. Language used is English.
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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Mon Mar 31, 2014 5:16 pm

:) Meanwhile in Washington DC...

Where have all the ugly ghosts gone?

By Gary Brave.

The restoration of the White House has progressed rather fast, after the dramatic Thanksgiving, last year, and the viewers that were Ufo-kidnapped, together with ghosts and ugly birds, have all been found. Dazed but without memory of the event.

The ghost-hunter, Gary Nurmi, has moved to his son Leon Panetta and we have been told by a maid there (20000 dollars :roll:), that they were visited by the presidents Obama and Putin, for a meet and greet, with the holy Tse and a very hairy ape.

The maid happened to see how an enormous giant with hundreds of wolves squeezed themselves in and created big fear and confusion. The giant was there to tell the ape, that he had bumbed all the other apes, in a valley in North America. The hairy one vojneded a lot over that.

I contacted a colleague, Gary Newman, on Seattle Times and he confirmed, that there indeed had been a bumbing in the Mount Baker-area. A hiker on Baker had seen an incredible big crowd of hairy apes in the valley Mount Oven, and that a large Ufo-Tent-Bubble in the sky, had thrown two bumbs on the apes.

But the apes did curiously not die, in the direct hit. Oh, nono,when the dust finally settled, the valley was almost cooking with strange animals. The apes had changed to Bat-Wasps, yellowstriped with long wagging stings, and with BAT-HEADS and sharp BAT-TEETH. They were very hairy and flapflapflew upside down, with their legs as helicopter-wings.

The hiker took some pics (50000 dollars :roll:), but the editor has not dared to publish them. They are too scary. HUH! The "things" are now on their way to Seattle, on their flapflaplegwings and not even Jesus and his apostles know what will happen when they arrive...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Sat Apr 05, 2014 4:36 pm

:) The last "Spammer" standing, is a freckled girl...


Meanwhile in Seattle!

By Gary Newman.

An unimaginable disaster has hit Seattle and especially the Lynnwood area. I have spoken to an eyewitness, Gary Colin, and he told me a story, that could have been fetched from an horror-movie like "Apocalypse now."

"The sky went dark and the sun disappeared, behind an extremely big cloud of flying animals," said Colin. "They flew upside down, with their legs as wings and they hovered over us like helicopters. Suddenly, as on a given signal, they all dived and attacked us. First they stuck with their long waspstings, and gosh how it hurt. Then they turned around and bit big chunks, wherever they could. And gosh that hurt even more.

It was a massacre in Lynnwood and people screamed out their pain and fear, and rushed to shelter. From my closed window I could see the strangest thing I have ever seen. The scary wasp-like things started to circulate with their leg-wings. Round and round they went, but their legs seemed to be weaker and weaker, and with a horrible unison roar, they all fell to the ground. There they crawled around for a while and before my staring gaze, they suddenly changed to BLACK RATS that ran away to Jesus know where.

And now something even more peculiar has happened to us that were bitten. We have all started to grow thick hair on our bodies, and we are constantly talking about the waste of our feces. We think it ought to be dried and milled into flour and maybe then baked to spaghetticakes," said Gary Colin,one of the bitten in Lynnwood...

I Gary Newman have only one thing to say. And it is a big HUH.

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Stratowarius 3.0 » Fri Apr 11, 2014 1:39 pm

:( Was the last spammer. WAS! :(

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by HinatAArcticA » Sat Apr 12, 2014 8:22 pm

I'm proud to have started this topic... YEARS ago :)
No need to feel so afraid, colors last a lifetime and fade to gray...
Tony Kakko

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Stratowarius 3.0 » Sun Apr 13, 2014 4:52 am


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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Stratowarius 3.11 » Fri Apr 18, 2014 5:20 am

I would like to know what happened then. With those aliens so the story can go on if I had something to say.

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Sat Apr 19, 2014 12:56 pm

:) Jaja, this is some information, about the situation in Seattle...


Governor Jay Inslee,was worried and alarmed! President Obama was worried and alarmed! The news about his contacts with Holy Tse, the Hairy Ape and the Giant were, through a greedy maid, in all media. The panic was close.

It was said, that a dangerous and epidemic plague was spread by black biting alienrats and that there was no cure whatsoever. People got hot from fever and threw their clothes in the nearest bin. In stead they soon had thick hair on their bodies and they looked like apes. Some ratbitten baker baked only spaghetticakes, made of dried ratshit, which they ate with enthusiasm.

Scientists all over the world wrinkled their foreheads and Obamas first assistant, Gary Gay Nurmi, summoned Prof ÖHubble. They went to Seattle together, in protective clothing, since both the rats and the ratbitten residents had multiplied and grown bigger. They were all over the town and communicated in a Flaviolanguage that no one understood. They looked like angry, hairy apes and they were angry, hairy apes.

"Vojne, vojne, we must do something fast. Very fast,"said Öhubble, when Nurmi told him about the moleculed apes planes. And the cyanide in their blood. Öhubble thought and thought, while he hummed some Getzsolos. Suddenly he laughed a happy big laugh.

"I have it, I have it. I will make a concoct of anticyanidechloride and fishliveroil and inject bananas. All aliens are allergic to raw fish, but they will never suspect the bananas. They will gobble them like the babbs they are. I have created a new fruit. Fishbabbebanana."

Said and done. ÖHubble made his drug and then they prepared, almost all of Seattles supply of bananas and put out them in strategic places.

The effect was quick. Bomkanom, bomkanomnomnom. Small explosions all over Seattle. Moleculeaperatexplosions...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by AAAAAAAAAA » Sun Apr 20, 2014 1:04 am

Some ratbitten baker baked only spaghetticakes, made of dried ratshit

Copremesis!

What a broadside... :x :roll:

It is not how it works in the states....

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Sun Apr 20, 2014 7:40 am

:lol: pffffffffff... Not you! At all! How could you even think that? It was Anal-Emma that bakes only spaghetticakes from ratpööh now! Jaja!

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by AAAAAAAAAA » Sun Apr 20, 2014 10:10 am

Oh oh ok! Do you really mean that? Or you are just writing because you want to stay on top all night? I can't let that happen. I'm unable to sleep so tonight I will be on top.... :twisted:



Also, its pffffft, dear :roll:

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Stratowarius 3.0 » Mon Apr 21, 2014 4:35 am

:x what? :? :? :roll: :roll:

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Mon Apr 21, 2014 9:02 am

:oops:
Sorry!
My mistake!
I am a freckled goose!
:lol: :lol:

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Stratowarius 3.0 » Tue Apr 22, 2014 3:31 am

:) :) so nice to hear, See you. :)

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:20 am

:)

Curled up, sleeping in the sun,
Be worn out from having fun,
Chasing dreams in sunrays,
That is how I want to spend my days...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Fri Apr 25, 2014 1:02 pm

:( Huh! The last "spammers", last report, from a dying town...

By Gary Newman.

Governor Jay Inslee is desperate. His crown, his Emerald-city, the beautiful, progressive Seattle is no more. The residents have left the sinking ship, as the rats and human-apes, that survived, because they were bananasuspicious. The streets stink of exploded remnants, from those who gulped the prepared fruits.

The inventive professor and the goatfarmer have fled, and the surviving rats have moleculed. Again! They are now big as pigs, with sharkteeth and gosh, can and will they bite. The transformation from bitten humans, to biting apes is also more rapid and they are many, many.

But, the most scary news is that the big humanapes have been seen all over the world, the last weeks, and that they bite whomever, wherever they are. Humans have fast changed to hairy apes and it seems to be an Apocalypse now. It is a question of survival of all humanity.

There is though a very remarkable exception. Two Nordic countries, Sweden and Finland are saved, like some Noah's ark. There was a great onrush of refuges, so the authority had to close the borders. Maybe they, from some strange reason, will be spared as a sanctuary. But how fun can it be, to be saved, with those ugly, hairy apes as only neighbors. And their spaghetticakes ... :roll: :roll: :roll:

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Sun Apr 27, 2014 3:57 pm

Image

:? Woff woff

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Mon May 05, 2014 4:34 pm

:)

Science Magazine.

A ratbit that changed the world.

By Professor ÖHubble.

Never before has our world been so complex, when we choose technology or make informed decisions about processes.

I have observed patterns of the DNA-forms, from a ratbitten individual, Gary Colin, from Seattle, where it all started, and I have found that, in addition to his ordinary DNA, he has got a tail of some different genes. It is an interesting molecularbuilt bridge, uniting the core-ideas. And it develops a coherent based view of gene set. In this tail you can find the gen for allergy against fishprotein and for extreme bodyhairproduction. What is also very surprising, is the hormonegallop and the tracking fluxes of animal energy.

The new shapes, determine many of the living things structure and functions. And the stability and determinants of rates of a change or evolution of the new gensystem. They are critical elements and very interesting.

I am sure, that my innovation will be challenged by competitors, all over the world, but they are welcome. The Earth is now an open place for emigrants from all Universe, and different types of genes will put our gensystem in rocking and rolling...

Vojne vojne, that is what I say... :?

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Sun May 18, 2014 1:25 pm

:( Not much activity here...

Jaja! Much hard work awaits me. I determined Gary Nurmi's DNA and gosh what a strange result. As a joke I also tested a couple of goats and I could hardly believe my eyes. Gary was the father of three goats. He is a goatfather...HUH!

I was indeed stunned, and tested the whole herd. Some could call Nurmi their papa, but the rest had human genes. I often work with those tests, for the Finnish police, so I went through the registry, and BUMKABUM and gosh in Hell. There it was...

A Polish judge had asked for DNA in a paternity suit, and the Finnish guy in question was not only father to a Polish child, but also to Nurmi's goats. No doubt! At all! What a broadside!

Next enigma was, that the Finnish guy and Nurmi's DNA had resemblances. They were far from identical, but had many similarities, and the conclusion must be, that Goat-Aliens have been here on Earth for a very long time.

More questions than answers, and we must DNA-determine all mankind to establish who is a Human-Being and who is a Goat-Alien. Are there many Human-Goats and Alien-Humans, like the guy in the Polish court? The racism will peak for sure...

My question now is, if we maybe can use stem-cells from Gary Nurmi's goats to cure the ape-or-rat- bitten hairy, spaghetticakeeating, poor humans, all over the world. There is much work before we know, so I must ask everyone, not yet bitten, to take care and look up for nasty biters out there... :? :?

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Wed May 21, 2014 12:18 pm

:) Huh! I can understand, that you are eager to know, how close I have come to a bodyhaireliminationcure, so I am going to tell you, even if my method not is scientifically verified and rather controversial and embarrassing.

Gary Nurmi telescoped two ratbitten hairy guys, Gary Colin and Gary Nea, to the goatfarm and I started to inject them with manipulated goatstemcells. Such cells (not goat though) have earlier been used, to grow hair on bald rats and I thought why not do it the other way round. So I used the most bald goats cells and mixed them with Nurmis, to a special baldgoataliencellsoup.

It didn't take long, before there were effects. Gary and Gary started to lose their furs in a rather scary pace, and they looked soon as newborn babies. Everyone were overjoyed with the success.

But, but, we jumped around to soon. There were side-effects. Grave, unexpected side-effects and consequences. It started with their toes. They grew longer and longer and looked almost like fingers. Then also their whole feet. And HUUUUUU. Their genitals developed an abnormal growth.

I was stunned! Again a scientific broadside!

Of course nothing to laugh at! No no, not at all! But, but. It was impossible not to. They looked so...Hahahaha...Barefoot and without trousers...Hahahaha. Then the "Thing" also changed color...It was suddenly Hungarian green. HAHAHAHA...

But Gary and Gary weren't that amused. No, no, and they blame ME. :? :? So I have to hurry up and find some way to diminish this calamities. But how, how, that is the big question... :? :?

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Fri May 23, 2014 12:06 pm

:) Hi Robo! I am so glad, that you are following my attempts to save the world... :luv1: :luv1:


Bangelibang on the Finnish farmdoor, and the bangelibanger was a rather strangelooking hairy guy, that was a look-alike, to my fat friend Arnold. And indeed, he was a younger brother of the fatty and introduced himself as Gary Layne. He also told me that he had heard, that I was making big things there on the farm and that he wanted my help.

The two Garys howled, that I was a crazy lunatic, and that Layne had to run for his life. But he (Layne of course :roll:) was very insistent, and since I am a kind man, I decided, against my better judgement, to make him happy. He was really very hairy and would look more "layne" , without that extra bodyhair.

But, the fur wasn't his problem, he said. No, no, he simply wanted a bigger micro...

I knew from brother Arnolds lamentations, that the Layne family has genetically extremely small micros, and since I happened to have some goatalienstemsoup left, I injected him, with a double doze, since he was so very hairy and had such a miniminimicro..

But, this soup is apperently very hazardous and unstable, so Layne's fur didn't fall of! At all! NO, no, instead it grew thicker. AND thicker! AND a more hairy guy has never walked on this Earth. AND his toes and feet became smaller. AND smaller! AND almost disappeared. :?

BUT, huh and goshgosh! Something else was also disappearing. Vojne, vojne!:shock: :shock: :shock:

We couldn't believe our eyes, and the Garys blamed of course me. :shock: They used nasty words, throw things at me and threatened to free the world from my services.

I had to run for life, four kilometers, to the bus, that luckily just passed and I am now in Helsinki again.

Left on the farm, for indefinite time, are two hairless, pale Garys, with big feet and toes and enormous hanging "jokes". AND a very hairy Gary Layne, with no "joke". At all!

HUHHUH and many vojne vojne... :shock: :shock: :shock:

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Wed May 28, 2014 1:14 pm

:x Now I am angry, at the Finnish Blabberpapers, and I will quote one of the worst.

Helsingin Sanomat

What is happening at the Russian border?

By Gary Kööskikääki.

A Gary Sampinen, living in Koskalukka, near the Russian border, has told me, that he one day saw, the from Stratovarius Forum wellknown professor ÖHubble, running like hell after a bus. He was hunted by three very oddlooking guys. Two were naked with pale skin, bigbig feet and enormous humping genitals. The third had a thick fur and was limping, since he had almost no feet. At all. :roll:

The professor was saved by the bus and the three were shaking their fists and swore long tirades in English, when they saw ÖHubble, from the buswindow, give them, both his longfingers and his longlong tongue.

But what is behind this weird behaviors and what were this strangelooking individuals doing in the Finnish forest, close to Russia. Spies? Russian spies? And why was our professor ÖHubble involved?

This reporter has tried to get some information, but neither ÖHubble nor the Goatfarmer have any comments. So I turned to the Finnish Secret Police, but was told to fuck off and mind my own business. But there are apparently many dogs buried here and I have gone further by reading Stratos Neverending more thoroughly. The crazy ÖHubble tells us there an incredible fantasystory about allergic aliens and other peculiar things on that goatfarm in Koskalukka. He even claims that the hairviruses that now are plaguing the world, except the North, are spread by a new sort of aliens. The rat and apealiens. :lol: :lol:

Gary Pekka Nurmi, a true Finn, is said to be a goatalien and all his goats are alienhuman warriors. :lol: :lol:

But, but, I wonder now. IF and this is a big IF. IF the good professor's all fabricated stories are the truth and nothing but? In that case Stratoforum would be the most enlightened place in the world and we are all in great danger...

HUHHUH

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Sat May 31, 2014 11:46 am

:) Here is more for you to study, Mr Kööskikääki, since I have to go on and inform humanity, about the actual situation in the world.


Mr Kööskikääki was right, when he supposed that the bodyhairgrowing explosion was caused by virus. But what he doesn't understand, is that this virus is alien and came to the Earth, with the hairy apes.

I had in my lab some bloodtests from the Garys in Koskalukka, and when I looked at one enlarged sample in my microscope, I got the shock of my life. In that tiny drop were hundreds of alienviruses. It was like a military camp and they seemed organized in groups, ready to attack.

They had round bodies, with thin legs and their heads were as big as their bodies. They looked like ugly birds and everyone rolled their eyes against me, in a simultaneous movement. It was horrible and I have never seen a such devilish sight. It affected me so harshly, that I fell from my chair.

When I had come to my senses and dared to look in my microscope again, I observed that they had changed positions. All were now turned against my gazing eyes and big uglybirdeyeballs met mine. There was also a sound I have never heard before. It was pure evil and can't be described.

I didn't know what to do. So I drastically and in desperation poured a whole bottle of fishliveroil over my microscope and over all Garytests. I hoped that this alienviruses would, like all other aliens, be allergic to fishprotein and die of the shock. I also heard a surprised and angry cry...so...

But, I have still not dared to look at the oildevastation and if all alienviruses really have gone to their maker. But I will, I will...

So Mr reporter, what do you think of this "fantasy"? Isn't it in this of you so ridiculed "Neverending" you can find the light of truth? And isn't there all the reasons in the world to be scared?

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Mon Jun 02, 2014 11:51 am

:)

After many anxious hours, I at last dared to look at the oil-soaked alienviruses, and I feared that they in some sneaky, cunning alienway had survived and would laugh their evil, unison laughs at me. But glory, glory hallelujah, they had all exploded in a greyred uglybirdsoup.

Now started my creative brain to work. If fishliveroil could give the alienviruses in my bloodsamples a deadly allergyshock. Mustn't the oil also kill the viruses in the rat and apebitten humans?

I went to Koskalukka and since I had promised the suspicious and angry Garys a really safe cure, they didn't kill me.

I had bought a fishliveroildunk and it was maybe a little old and overripe, but even if the Garys complained and spitted a lot, they drank it all.The end justifies the means, and it didn't take long before we could see results. It began with greyred violent vomitings and dead alienviruses flowed out.

The first sign of change could then be seen at the two Garys big feet, that got smaller and smaller. AND gosh and wonder over all wonders they could wear pants. AGAIN! Gary Laynes thick fur fell off in droves and his micro showed up again, sorry to say not an inch bigger than before the stamcellcure. But a small micro is better than no micro, so he didn't scream too much about that.

We were all very happy over the success and rat and apebittens all over the world will be overjoyed, when they hear about the Finnish discovery. The fishliveroilindustry will flourish and I ÖHubble will surely get the Nobel-Prize in medicine this year. Probably not for the oilcure though, but for the more spectacular detection of aliengenes in Finnish goats.

After this post I will take a break from "Neverending" and you nine, that have followed and supported me, will be invited to my great Nobel-Party in Sweden in December...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by JensJohansson » Thu Jun 12, 2014 3:14 pm

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ » Sat Jun 14, 2014 1:44 pm

:lol:

Problem in Koskalukka!

The goatfarmer, Pekka Nurmi, has problems with his goats! They have become rebellious and anarchistic, and their leader Gary Redeyed, a gigantic sharphorned, aggressive, longtongued and Putinloving animal, that always acts before he thinks, is their idol.

Recently this brute went on a destruction-tour to the nearest village, where he demolished everything that came in his way. He also arranged a rite and sacrificeplace for the aliendevil where nine Finns had to give their lives.

The villagers were furious and marched to the farm and demanded compensation and goatdeath in a big scale.

But Nurmi denied all knowledge of some redeyed goat and declared that all his goats were totally innocent and more like white lambs.

But he knows very well, that he has a goatproblem. Gary Goat has a troop of fifty criminal followers and Nurmi has heard them määääa and bäääa about violent tours all over Finland. So he must DO something...

A leading philanthropic lady in Koskalukka has suggested, that he could build some youthgoatclubhouse where the misguided and restless goats could play, for example, table tennis. She is sure it would be a great success but Nurmi is doubtful.

But, but, he has a big alien-goat-adaption-and- integration-problem to take care of, and solutions are difficult to find.

Who in this world can help this alien goatfarmer... :roll: :roll: :roll:

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Tue Jun 17, 2014 5:17 pm

Ha ha! :x It serves MR Reporter Scoundrel right! He got what he deserved for ridicule me and "Neverending".The only true thread in all Internet...

Helsingin Sanomat.

A scary experience.

By Gary Kööskikääki.

I read Stratovarius sight and saw a funny goatgame, about a redeyed rather aggressive goat, that ravaged in Koskalukka. Then we heard about a very strange animal, that killed nine persons, in just that village and I was sent to investigate the story.

I was sure it was some tall tale, made up by those superstitious rednecks in the woods, and I was really astonished, when I saw how their "animal" had destroyed houses and properties, and actually killed nine men. And till that dragged them to a riteplace in the deep forest.

The villagers were extremely frightened and upset, when they described the beast, as a redeyed and bighorned goat with superpower. He came from the goatfarm, close to the border, where it is said to happen incredibly scary things.

I went to the farm for an interview with the farmer Gary Nurmi. But he was totally uncomprehending. He had never seen a redeyed goat and the villagers were a bunch of superstitious and retarded idiots, that invented the most absurd things to get rid of him and his goats.

This was also my theory, but I decided to take a secret look in the surroundings, so I strolled out in the forest. Soon enough I felt that something was following me...

Then I saw it...

It was indeed a huge goat. His eyes were big and gleaming red, and a dull threatening bäääääing was heard. He lowered his huge head...and gosh how fast I ran over logs and stones...

But suddenly I felt a tight grip around my left leg, and it was something like a pink tongue, that was superglued to me. I was in real danger and ripped off my pants and left them with the glued tongue. Then faster than fast, up in the nearest big tree...

The goat mäade and bäade in frustration over the empty pants, but didn't see me and continued his wild rampage into the forest.

After a while I slipped and fell from the tree. I hit my head, and someone must have saved me, for now I am in hospital. The problem is that I don't remember a thing, after the fall and I can now only sing a Finnish midsummersong and wish you all a happy Midsummer. The melody is from "Memory"...

Minne, jag har tappat mitt minne,
Är jag svensk eller finne?
Kommer inte ihåg...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Hubble86 » Wed Jun 25, 2014 1:13 pm

:) Hi, I am Gary Kööskikääki, from Helsingin Sanomat, and you can call me Kööski, as my friends do. I have permission from Öhubble and the Stratoadmin, to use ÖHubbles nick, since my editor categorically refuses to publish "fabricated fantasystories about scary aliengoatmonsters, that kill on an ongoing basis, for rites to an Aliendevil. Sanomat is NOT a SF-magazine", he says. :roll:

I am back from the hospital, where I spent a boring and sober Midsummer. It was the farmer and alienboss Nurmi that saved my life, when he heard the redeyes roars and my deathscreams. He feared the worst and was happy when he found me alive.

But when I informed the doctors, that a goat tried to kill me and licked me, with his at least 30 meter long supergluetongue, they laughed heartily and I suspect that they didn't really believe me.

Gary Nurmi later told me that the goat had found my Midsummerkoskibottle and was very drunk, when he swayed to the village for a new raid. But the rednecks overpowered him, and retaliated on the most dreadful way. Then they threw him in a dark cellar and are planning to kill and eat him in some pagan ceremony.

I am now really convinced, that ÖHubble has found a big aliengoatnest and that his discovery soon will change our view of our own existence. Nurmi has told us that aliens were on this planet billions of years ago and there are safe evidences,that no one can contradict.

I am so proud to be a part in this and everyone that read "Neverending", can have the same feeling.

We and Stratoforum are participants in the discovery of a new world...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Kööski » Fri Jun 27, 2014 4:35 pm

:) Ja, ja! Now I have got my own nick and I am writing from the Nurmifarm, since my editor has sacked me. I brought shame to Helsingin Sanomat, he said. But I wonder, if that can be possible. :roll:

Well, well, now I am pressagent for Öhubble and I will here report the first goatincident in Koskalukka.

The redeyed goatmonster was killed and flayed. The rednecks had built a big bonfire for the grilling, and invited us to the ceremony. But Nurmi refused to visit the "inbred retards", so Öhubble and I went alone.

The atmosphere was high and they had been drinking some homemade kosken throughout the evening. It tasted kerosene and Öhubble told me one could be blind, if one had bad luck, but they didn't seem to care.

They put up the redeyed for grilling, over the flaming fire, and started to chant in a weird language. Soon they got ecstatic and fell to the ground in cramps. It was really creepy and ominous and Öhubble wanted us to leave at once. But some of the big and drunken guys grabbed and dragged us closer to the fire. I thought they would threw also us in the heat and gosh how scared I was.

But just as I felt their hardened grip, we saw how the goat raised his head and the most frightening roarhowling, you can imagine, was heard. I was convinced that it was Satan himself that screamed.

The goats eyes started to glow and he continued his howling. God Heavens Lord! We all fell on our knees and I wet my pants. I also prayed to all Gods and Saints I could remember.

Then it looked as the goat caught fire and in a big red flame it lifted himself from the bonfire. Up, up
in a hazy cloud of goatsmoke, he went to the sky. Up like a burning balloon, and something exploded in an horrendous bumkabum. I was almost deaf and I can't remember how we came to the farm again.

But now the rednecks have a new story about Nurmi and his dangerous, flying goats and his image is worse than the worst. And new petitions about his elimination will be written...Again...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Kööski » Sun Jul 06, 2014 12:32 pm

:) Jaja! Now I and Öhubble are in Costa Rica and hunting wild goats, on the volcanoeslopes. Nurmi told us that those goats are of a very ancient bread, and Öhubble wanted to examine their DNA-status.

And just as he suspected. Those wild species have a very peculiar look and behavior, and they also had that spectacular Finnish aliengenes. Farmers who live close to the volcanoes have tamed some of these animals, and from their milk they make an exclusive and expensive yoghurt, they call Tjottahunti, not to confuse with the more banal Turkish Tjatjiki.

A farmer told us that most of the Tjottahunti is delivered to the Costa Rica soccerteam, and that it probably is just this sauce, that is the reason for their success.

But, but, before their last game an envious Brazilian villain threw away all their sauce, and they lost their concentration on the penalty-kicks. They didn't get their important yoghurt under the break and their left brainhalf, that is addicted to the sauce, didn't work. At all! So they missed!

It has something to do with the reptilebrain, or as Öhubble calls it, the Alienbrain, that needs this special goatsauce for a maximal function.

And what is Öhubble's conclusion of this? Jaja! Just so! He wants to test the DNA on all the players in the famous team. And guess what he suspects...Vojne, vojne...

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Re: Neverending Story [Game]

Post by Kööski » Tue Jul 08, 2014 12:45 pm

:) Jaja! I am going on here! After all, I am a pressagent...

:roll: :roll: Gosh, what a hallabalo! ÖHubble got the testresult he had feared, so he contacted colleagues, all over the world, and asked them to DNA-examine their soccerplayers.

The answers came rather quickly and it was a really both exceptional and gloomy reading. Every team from WM in Brazil (with one outstanding exception :luv1:) had many players with aliengenes.

ÖHubble talked to FIFA, but they didn't believe him and called him humiliating things, as hippie and opportunist. This made the professor furious and he summoned a pressmeeting in Costa Rica, where all players were tested alien and drugpositive.

A lot of curious mediapeople came and TV sent direct. Öhubble started to say, that he had something very, very serious to tell them, and then he picked up a bottle of Tjottahunti. " This my friends",he said,"this is Tjottahunti, a dopingsauce and a drug used by soccerplayers in this WM. The wild goats here in central America eat a plant called "Little Coca" and the drug goes direct to their milk. The aliens have special recipients, in their brains, for this drug and are soon affected. They get much higher physical performances of it, but they are also dependent and it destroys their bodies after a short time.

This expensive Tjottahunti is exported to the soccerteams, in just those countries, that were qualified to WM in Brazil."

This pressmeating was a bumkabum to FIFA. If this informations were confirmed it was the biggest scandal in FIFA'S history. Could they just ignore it? Or must they cancel WM 2014 and arrange a new alien and drugfree one. Questions! Questions! And no answers. At all!

But, but, there is one little light, in the black tunnel! :) One country that is alien and Tjottahuntifree gives some hope. And it is of course!
GERMANY!

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