Most nicest poster

[Kosmo]

HELLOO

[AAAAAAAAAA]

HELLOO

Kosmo! Kosmo! Kosmo!

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Aber! Doch! Do I, Challeheinze, have a new-old problem??? YES! I have!!!!

Little Aberaber has grown and there seems to be a bigbig bumb in his stomach!!!

HUHUHUHUHUHUH NOOOOOO!

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Yes! The most strange thing happens here in Mödrat. My ward, Aberaber's stomach has grown bigger and still bigger, and we thought that it was gas or some steak that had distorted itself. Or as he (Aberaber also) believed, it was a bowlball that his brother Arnold had swallowed in the wrong throat, since he (Arnold also) has talked about that so often.

So I took him (Aberaber also) to my housedoctor. He (the doc also) pressed and pinched the poor Aberabers big bumb and it moved around and kicked as something very living. So he(the doc also) got a minor nervous shock and collected me from the waiting-room.
"We have a big problem", he (the Doc) said, "It seems as the boy is pregnant"!
"Huhuh", said I, "Butt that must be totally impossible".
"Ja, huhuhuh, butt, aber, doch. There is something lively, living in there", said the doc.
Then a thought hit me. Boom Kaboom!
"He is a twin (Aberaber also), born in Seattle. Can he be a twin of a twin"?
"What in fuck are you talking about?", said the doc, "TWIN of a TWIN? Who is the other twin and how, where, whom, WHAT, WHAT?
"Strange as it may sound, this boy has lived inside his twin in 24 years and he (his twinbrother also) is trying to kill him. Can he (Aberaber also) have one more twin INSIDE him"?
He (the doc also) fainted.

And I also feel a bit weak now, so I (Challe also) think I better rest a bit...

To be continued when I feel more up to it...

[Arnold Layne]

HUH!

Arnold Layne

[Martin Van Buren]

Allow me to inject some class into this thread.
I'm former president Martin Van Buren, and I volunteer to take aber-aber-aber-aber into the White House. He will be fed three meals a day (each with 4 beers), be given a fresh set of clothes (one-size-fits-all), and as if that weren't enough- a 3-month-old Pomeranian. Did you know that stroking their soft, furry underbellies can work wonders for your blood pressure?

[Ilsekena]

No, sir! We're all coldblooded here

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Allow me to inject some class into this thread.
I'm former president Martin Van Buren, and I volunteer to take aber-aber-aber-aber into the White House. He will be fed three meals a day (each with 4 beers), be given a fresh set of clothes (one-size-fits-all), and as if that weren't enough- a 3-month-old Pomeranian. Did you know that stroking their soft, furry underbellies can work wonders for your blood pressure?

Thank You mr President. Thank You number eight!

For all the things You have done,
The battles You have won,
The way You deal,
With us steel,
And our problem the ton,
We thank You so much.

Butt, butt, I have to decline Your generous offer, since Aberaberaberaber not yet is outpicked from his twins stomach and we still argue about his existence. Is he a big gasbubble, a baby, a bowlball or a twin?

[Stevie Wonder]

dkfsdauf98df9ydshfbdssd]f\]\f]d;f.,/.,mknxvspoifjie4124124#%$^&5421

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Jaja! Now I have rested and can go on with this neverending story about twins as Russian dolls.You know those where one doll hides a smaller one and that one an even smaller and so on until the last one is invisible.
When I left you we were with dr. Strumph. Aberaber on a bench, with his stomachbump kicking as never before. Something in there was angry and wanted to come out.
On the floor dr Strumph. Fainted! I called for the nurse and she started to scream.
"Oh, he is dead, my Herbert is dead, my lieblingsliebling is dead! Uhuuuuuuu"
Lieblingsliebling??? My Herbert??? What??? The good doctor is married with Gertrude 54 and has seven children!. Liebling? What is the world coming to?
"NO, he is not dead", I said and poured a jar of icewater over the Liebling...
Herbert woke up and was wise enough to blush, when his nurse crawled all over him. He looked at me and pushed her away.
"So, so! I just fainted a little, because the boy here is probably pregnant and something of a medical sensation. We have to let a gyndoc look at him. He is maybe a Virgin-Mother-Father. Your explanation, Karlheinz is too eccentric. Twin in a twin in a twin. Oh NONO! I will Not believe that. Not at all, Karlheinz. You are sometimes just a bit to much".
I couldn't help it, but I laughed out loud. "Jaja, we vill see who is the eccentric here! Virgin-birth? Hahaha! I put up 1000 euro, on the twin-theory"!
"Top", said the obtuse doctor-liebling, sure of victory.
There we are now. Aberaber has got an appointment with the gyndoc next week, and then we will know who has earned 1000 euro! Virgin-birth! PFFFFF

[Stevie Wonder]

fdsahy983uebfjasdfgsadfF{SAFdsa-f=-asdgldfsgf;g,f.gd[foiuy837rtfge

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Jaja, I can see that you have problem to express yourself. Maybe you can get some help from a speech- therapist. I am so sorry for you, but it doesn't help if you repeat the same shit 100 times. You risk to be banned here.

[Hubble86]

These are the laughwrinkled twins! Bo and Ro! The laughing faces! Jäjä! My favoritefavoritefaces!

Time to look at you! Again!

[robocop656]

OOHHOHO!! HO!! HO!! HO!!!!

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

OOHHOHO!! HO!! HO!! HO!!!!

Huh! This must be an evil spirit, that looks like he is going to eat you. The stuff that nightmares are woven by and that causes acute anxiety...Huh! Again!

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Aber-aber-aber-aber-aber-aber-aber-aber-aber-aber is demanding child support. Again! HUH!

Arnold LAAAAAAAAAAyne

[Chang]

Hello you shits!
Chang make a guangdong vacation!
It is china-new-year. Puffsmoke celebrate!!! YES!!

[Hubble86]

You sacramental, blasted, belly-wriggeling, chinese-hirocine. If you dare to come here again, with your lose screws in disorder, I will gladly throw you down my three stairs. Again!

Everything fucked up is your fault! If you hadn't let Bushy and Bamsy borrow all that money, there wouldn't be so many problems, ass it is now!! Usurer!

But! HAHAHAHA

YOU WILL NEVER GET THEM BACK!

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

I knew it was one of the most idiotic and meaningless docvisits. Ever. But what can one not do for 1000 euro?

So we came in a collected group, Aberaber of course, me, Herbert Strumph and his nurse (I never understood why she must gad about there. )
The gyndoc was a newexamined Finn, Lauri Porvonen, and he was rather surprised over the congregation.
"And, what have we here"? He looked at the nurse. "Please sit up! And the gentlemen can maybe go out now"!?
"No, no" said the nurse,"We are here with this young man since he probably is pregnant"!
"Pure bullshit", said I, "He has either a bowlball or a twin in his stomach"!
"Huh, hrm, what"? said Lauri, and looked rather stupid.
"Jaja, and it is about 1000 euro, so will you please take an Ultra-look at his bumb", said Herbert and pushed Aberaber to the gyn-stool.

The nurse took his trousers (Aberabers also) and he climbed up and spread his legs.
"Huh, hrm, what", said the repetitive Finn, "But, but, here is no way in or out for a baby..."
"No of course not! He is a guy"! said I and shook my head. How silly could a Finnish doc be? "I have told you that the bumb is a twin. He (Aberaber also) is a twin to fat Arnold in Seattle and if he could be a twin so can this bumb be a twin! If it isn't a bowlball also"!

"Huh,hrm, what? A twin? But, but...
"Oh those docs! Must I explain everything in detail? Yes a TWIN!. Not so strange. Hah"?
Now Lauri was very red, in his finnish face.
"You came here with this poor young man and are trying to joke with me because I am a foreigner and rather new. It is discrimination. Out! OUT...

"No,no", said the nurse," this is the distinguished dr Herbert Strumph and the famous composer Stockhausen and they really want to know what it is in the bumb.
"Ok, Ok, said Lauri. This is rather unorthodox but I will take a look at this BUMB!

He did! And! He fainted!

This faintings seem to be infectious and I feel rather tired, so I think I must rest a bit. Again...

[Nurmi]

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Jaja, where were we? Yes on dr.Pervonens Gyn-clinic. Also, Aberaber in the gyn-stool, with his (not burnt) hair-ugly legs in the air, and we could all see, that there was something huffing and puffing, in all directions in his belly.
Lauri P. was on the floor. Fainted. And we called his nurse, but she wasn't his type, so she just shook him a bit and he woke up.
"Vojne, vojne", he was Finnish you know. "I have heard about twin-growths, but have thought it was only fairy-tales. But there is really something trapped in there and it is not a baby-or a bowlball".

"Haha", said I (Challe of course),"I knew it all the time. Give me your 1000 euro, Herbert. We have a second twin in there".
Herbert looked sour and insisted on having his own Ultra-look. And so we all had!

And IF there was a time and a place for bigbig HUH's it was then. HUH what a sight!

Close to Aberabers peritoneum, was a really angry face. It had long hair, big grinning teeth and wild eyes. And it looked at us, as if it could see us. And it talked! We could hear it as a stomachrumble and we could recognize some words. It was a clear Leeds-accent and the most repeated sentences were "Go fuck yourself, Shit in your pants and Go to hell you motherfuckers".

"Apparently a very displeased twin", said I
Herbert had established a new habit and he fainted again! But this time his nurse took it more easy and only kissed his forehead.
"Herbert dear, you have just lost 1000 euro", she said nigglingly.
"Bah, that wasn't the reason for my dizziness",said Herbert, now even more sour.
He sat up close to Lauri P, that also was back with us and had returned to be a gyn-doc.
"We must make a caesarean-section and I will do it myself".

Herbert was still a bit reluctant.
"But, But. It can't be a twin. It didn't look at all as Aberaber...
"A two-egg-twin", said I triumphingly, and stretched out my hand for the euros.

But now Lauri had seen something on the Ultra-screen.
"Look, listen", he groaned, "It sings. IT SINGS! And, and, IT IS A GIRL...

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Jaja! There was suddenly a fainting-epidemic going on. Herbert and his nurse Hedda, Germanly side by side, on the floor, and our Gyn-doc, in a typical finnish heap, close by. Only the Gyn-nurse and I was standing up.
Why all this fainting, you wonder! Ja, it was of course Aberabers stomach again. This time it was the singing girl-twin that pressed down the brain-blood, when she sang an English foot-ball-stand-song, and one could understand, that she had been at Leed-games, with her two brothers. Her voice was powerful and she had a strong Leeds-accent.

God save our gracious Leeds,
Long live our noble Leeds,
God save our Leeds,
Send them victorious,
Happy and glorious,
Long to rain over Chelsea notorious,
God save our Leeds.

Even if I, ass a German, not am, in the least, interested in English foot-ball, I couldn't help to be impressed, and a great feeling of love was growing inside my breast. I saw this twin-girl as my child and I wanted to see her be born. So I kicked the masked man and ordered him to take out the singing twin, in the light.
He obeyed, and after half an hour, we were introduced to twin number three. I called her Goal, since that was the word she had used the most. Goal Stockhausen. How does that sound? Ja, great!

Goal has yet no bumb, in her stomach, so maybe this is the end of this very, very, strange story, that gave me a bunch of twins to lighten up my old days.

Jaja, aber doch. Best to not be to sure...

[Arnold Layne]

Dear Diary,

Heinzy-Peinzy and I are reunited now and living happily with my new siblings. He thinks he can be on top, but that is not the way it works in Leeds. Jaja!

Aber-Aber, my sweet and wonderful brother, is dead now. I slit his throat.

I lost 50kg, but then I found it again. It was only a few hours of searching...I was hungry.

Other than that, I have taken up fencing. It isn't going so well. I showed up to first lesson ready to build some fences, butt they kept poking me with sharp swords. HUH!

Arnold Layne

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Aber Arnold. Why are you going public with our love-life? "On top", at least every other day, works everywhere, except in Leeds, Arnold...

You are so oldfashion and colonial, Arnold. Try to follow new trends and be a nice missionary wife sometimes. And to be honest, I am a bit afraid, that you one day will suffocate me, Arnold.

And please, Arnold, will you stop those public declarations of how we live in Mödrat. Or it will be known as a sin-Gomorra-Mödrat, Arnold...

[Derrick Rose]

Dear Diary,

Heinzy-Peinzy and I are reunited now and living happily with my new siblings. He thinks he can be on top, but that is not the way it works in Leeds. Jaja!

Aber-Aber, my sweet and wonderful brother, is dead now. I slit his throat.

I lost 50kg, but then I found it again. It was only a few hours of searching...I was hungry.

Other than that, I have taken up fencing. It isn't going so well. I showed up to first lesson ready to build some fences, butt they kept poking me with sharp swords. HUH!

Arnold Layne

Huh?

[Arnold Layne]

Dear Diary,

Heinzy-Peinzy and I are reunited now and living happily with my new siblings. He thinks he can be on top, but that is not the way it works in Leeds. Jaja!

Aber-Aber, my sweet and wonderful brother, is dead now. I slit his throat.

I lost 50kg, but then I found it again. It was only a few hours of searching...I was hungry.

Other than that, I have taken up fencing. It isn't going so well. I showed up to first lesson ready to build some fences, butt they kept poking me with sharp swords. HUH!

Arnold Layne

Huh?

HUH!
Do not mock me, you despicable mulatto bastard.

Arnold Layne

[Derrick Rose]

Dear Diary,

Heinzy-Peinzy and I are reunited now and living happily with my new siblings. He thinks he can be on top, but that is not the way it works in Leeds. Jaja!

Aber-Aber, my sweet and wonderful brother, is dead now. I slit his throat.

I lost 50kg, but then I found it again. It was only a few hours of searching...I was hungry.

Other than that, I have taken up fencing. It isn't going so well. I showed up to first lesson ready to build some fences, butt they kept poking me with sharp swords. HUH!

Arnold Layne

Huh?

HUH!
Do not mock me, you despicable mulatto bastard.

Arnold Layne

Ok, time for your daily doses of bacon is it?

[Arnold Layne]

Dear Diary,

Heinzy-Peinzy and I are reunited now and living happily with my new siblings. He thinks he can be on top, but that is not the way it works in Leeds. Jaja!

Aber-Aber, my sweet and wonderful brother, is dead now. I slit his throat.

I lost 50kg, but then I found it again. It was only a few hours of searching...I was hungry.

Other than that, I have taken up fencing. It isn't going so well. I showed up to first lesson ready to build some fences, butt they kept poking me with sharp swords. HUH!

Arnold Layne

Huh?

HUH!
Do not mock me, you despicable mulatto bastard.

Arnold Layne

Ok, time for your daily doses of bacon is it?

You are quite stupid to imply I have bacon just once a day. Mulatto bastard.

Arnold Layne

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Aber doch! I must tell you what really happened. Arnold has already told you in his diary, that he is back with me in Mödrat. But things are not what he believes.

We knew that he wanted to kill his brother, Aberaber, so we took some steps to hinder him. I gave Herbert Strumph back his 1000 euro and begged him to take care of Aberaber a while. He has so many children, so one more makes no difference.

Well well! Arnold was on his worst murder-mood when he came to me, and he asked repeatedly for his brother. I filled him with big steaks and a lotlot of beer, till he was so drunk that he fell in deep beer-sleep. I smeared his hands with earth and after ten minutes I woke him.

"Arnold, Arnold, what have you done? Arnold, Arnold, wake up. You have strangled your little brother, Aberaber. What shall we do? What shall we do, Arnold".
Arnold, very drunk. "Hrmhrm, whatwhat? Already? What did he say about that"?
"Nothing! He just died and you and I have burrowed him in the garden. Look you have still earth on your hands"!
"Did we? Really? I can't remember a thing! Must try to take it more easy with the beer. Gosh, do you think the police..."
"No, no, we digged really deap, but you must be quiet about it".
"Sure, sure Heinzy-Peinzy, I owe you now"!

"Jaja, it is OK, Arnold. And as a thank you, you can build a fence around us...
"Yes I will, and I love you Heinzy-Peinzy. I start as soon I am sober. And no more beer for a week. I promise you. I had no idea I could be so blood-thirsty".

So now I have a two meter high fence around all my property. And that is important, so no one can see the cross from leftoverplanks, that Arnold and I have put over little Aberabers grave...

[Arnold Layne]

Dear Diary,

Gosh, I have such a headache. I really need an ass-pirin. What have I been through? HUH!

Jaja! I remember. I killed my ugly brother aber-aber, and ate his liver. Excellent.

Butt, I have new ass-pirations. Once I first tasted blood, I craved even more.

I hereby declare that I, Arnold Layne, of Leeds, will kill Karlheinz Stockhausen and eat his liver. For the medicinal properties, of course!

How shall I do it? A dagger in the arse while he sleeps? A guitarra-to the temple? Splash some ass-id to his face?

No, no. It must involve muffins...with onions. I will give the muffinbaker a call...

Arnold Layne