Most nicest poster

[AAAAAAAAAA]

This just in: Arnold is out. :nervous:
Details forthcoming...

Hide your braces, Lisa...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Lisa lost her braces long ago! Pablo? Again?

Lisas miseryindex is 26. (Hunan bokchoy with roosted snails. And Sicuansoup share this number, strange enough)
Pablo?

[Arnold Layne]

HUH?


HUH? HUH? HUH??

Arnold Layne

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Aber doch, Arnold. Where are you? And why are you huuing all the time, Arnold?
When I was a little boy my dear German mother used to ask me like this. "What does the cow say, Challe-henze?
And I answered "Muuuuu, muuuu". .
She went on,"And the little dog"?
I in German obedience. "Vofvofvof".
"But here is a difficult one, henze. The big tufftufftrain?
In those days, Arnold, we had steam-train in Germany, so I answered and got my first applause.

HuhhuhhuhHUH, HuhhuhhuhhuhHUH, HuhhuhhuhhuhuhHUUUUU.

Is this how you think, Arnold? As a tufftufftrain?

[Arnold Layne]

Exclusive interview of Karlheinz Stockhausen by our very own, Arnold Layne!!

Arnold: Umm. Hello. Arnold here. Thank you for, for taking the time to talk to me. Welcome.

Karlheinz: Welcome in the Collectingallsortsofclothpegsclub. But you can't come in before you have 9000 pegs

Arnold: Ha-ha

Karlheinz: So you find that hilarious. Huh! I can tell you hilarious. German humour. THAT is HILARIOUS. Jawohl said the girl! HAHAHA

Arnold: Which "girl"? HUH?

Karlheinz: That stupid girl. I could puke all day over that stupid, stupid girl and the stupid, stupid poet...

Arnold: HUH?? Poet?? Which poet?

Karlheinz: Who can that be? A Schiller? A Goethe?

Arnold: HUH? HUH? I am asking YOU.

Karlheinz: Blää. We Germans are more discreet you know

Arnold: Well then. I have never been, never been to Germany. I am from LEEDS. What do you think of our lovely place?

Karlheinz: There is a thick young man in Leeds, Who eats much, much more than he needs,

Arnold: HUH? HUH? HUH?? Who are you talking to. I would LOVE to know.

Karlheinz: Never forget what disciplin can do for your English baconbody, Arnold...

Arnold: Karlheinz, I am more than offended. HUH! Outrageous. Give me one reason not to end this interview right now.

Karlheinz: To get an end to this schabble I have to come out and tell you that I am Arnold Layne.

Arnold: HUUUUH!!!! You know how to piss me off.

Karlheinz: Don't piss on me little buddy. I can be very angry and then...

Arnold: HUH? HUH? HUH?? HUH?

Arnold Layne

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Ach Du Arnold! I must go to my composingwork now so I will give you an answer later on. But I will laugh all the way...

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Arnold, Arnold! This morning you made an interview with me and I think you mistook me for some sort of walrus and not an old man that knows very well that your baconbody is more than fine, Arnold. You and I have shared bed and breakfast for some time now, with for me regrettable interuptions, when you have been on sea-adventures in a "No-name-whale-stomach", so you have all the right in Germany to treat me with more disrespect, than in this interview. You can for example call me Heinzy-Peinzy, as you use to do more private.
I have often asked, who walks in the cold air without any underwear, and it can't be anyone but you Arnold. And this sight makes me so ecstatic, that I must exclaim. -"Oh My God, My fucking eyes. MY FUCKING EYES"... Love Arnold is a precious thing! :luv1:

[Arnold Layne]

Arnold Layne: HUH! Last time I spoke with Karlheinz he became, became very rude indeed. And now, he has apologized. I am pleased.

Karlheinz Stockhausen: I have seen it coming. So sorry! Hope it is not my fault!

Arnold Layne: Ahh, that's ok. You just had a bad day but you didn't mean a word about my baconbody. So don't worry!! Don't worry at all!

Karlheinz Stockhausen: I worry a lot in brief,
Why you think most of porn and roastbeef!

Arnold Layne: HUH! HUH!! What does this mean? I thought we are finished with teasings and ready to start fresh?

Karlheinz Stockhausen: Fresh? I know of a lady that puts up her washings in the "fresh" air. Jajaja!

Arnold Layne: And just why, tell me, do you think I should know about that?

Karlheinz Stockhausen: I work with washinglines and pegs nowadays. I build also castles from waterbottles....

Arnold Layne: HUH! I'm pretty upset right now.

Karlheinz Stockhausen: I don't think "pretty" is the right word here. Haha...

Arnold Layne: That's it. You can go to hell. HUH! HUH!! I am going home. BYE!!! :pissed3:

Karlheinz Stockhausen: May he chew in peace and come back to us when he is ready for the world. He has by the way four, at least I think that it is, teats......

Arnold layne

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Rude? Huh? Me? No! Arnold! Bitte! Not go back to Leeds, please! Your Heinze will miss you even when you are quarrelsome. You are like cayenne-pepper on nr 63-mantau-rice with shrimps and crabs cooked in soysauce, just for you, Arnold!
Our latest exchange of feelings, made me so sad and I wonder what really is behind your departure. Have you met someone else? Ligeti? He has always tried to steal from me. Listen to his Requiem. All me.

Arnold dearest! Here I have made a reconstruction of our latest verbale exchange of views...If you have forgotten...

KhS: What is the matter, Arnold? Why are you so upset?
Arn: I think I need a psychiatrist, Heinzi, Peinzi.
KhS: What is the deal with you? Maybe you need to chill out?
Arn: Why don't you explain to me why you do think that I am a big joke?
KhS: It is obvious that someone have to grow the fucking up here!
Arn: Do you have ears, because I do, so no need to yell...
KhS: Ears? You are always complaining over my eyes and now also over my ears!
Arn: So you can hear after all and what got you so worked up anyway? Now I like your strange eyes. You are after all a composer and hell I can't even compose myself.
KhS: No one asks you to, my dear Englishman.
Arn: That doesn't make any sense, what's the fuck up man, u are mixing me with someone else. Who do you think you are talking to? You were cheating on me after ten minutes and if you are not crazy, who is?
KhS: Huh!What?
Arn: I think I don't know you, so lay off. What bollock! Our relationship doesn't make sense any longer, so I will move back to Leeds. HuuuHuuuhuuuu...

Arn: No one succeds,
The man from Leeds,
And here I have done my deeds,
So bye,bye Heinzies threads...

KhS: Arnold, Arnold, my little cheeze,
Bitte, bitte come back to meeze,
Without you I will freeze and freeze,
To my bitter, bitter deaeze...

:luv1: :luv1:

Karlheinz Stockhausen, composer and creater.

[AAAAAAAAAA]

It seems you have insulted Arnold. Again!!

And now, after all the things that have transpired, you express your love. HUH!

I have captured my feelings on this matter in the only way I can....

Arnold's Loneliness
By A10 - LPS 2011

Arnold Layne's eyes glittered of hazelnut,
But all Karlheinz saw was his baconbutt-

Arnold Layne loved to chew, and how he did!
But everything he started, Karlheinz undid

Arnold Layne could climb the highest tower!
But Karlheinz thought- only to devour

Some world's largest sandwich he heard was up there,
And thus the rift began, in their love affair...

Now Arnold is back home in Leeds,
Probably, Karlheinz says, to chew on some weeds,
For that is how he mows the lawn-
Since he does not have the brawn...

...to push the lawn-mower to-and-fro,
So he does it in the only way, you know...
By biting and chewing those plants alone,
Until the seeds of his sorrow are sown.

Jaja...

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Bah! Hah! Now is Stockhausen a bit angry!


I will steal all your rhymes, I'm A Klepto,

And what is worst, with the least of regretto,

But It serves you so well,

Since you only will tell,

How bad I am to that Leeds big Fetto.


I have learnt that in Leeds live a Nut,

He is fat all around, and not only his Butt,

I did nothing wrong at all,

I even tried to make him small,

But he thanked me by calling me Slut.


He tried to build a big tower,

Of sandwich's he used as a cower,

Behind them he sat,

And chewed like a rat,

All the things that he could devour.


But my love as a German is great,

And I paid for all steaks that he ate,

I had to shop twice a day,

And on my daily shoppingway,

The Groceryboy and I made a date.


So Arnold can look at his life with me,

As an earlier boyfriend and see.

How he can deal with that,

And if he can be fat,

When his steaks no longer are free.


Jaja, Let him stay in Leeds. The life with me was nothing for him. I am too dynamic. Jaja.

[Derrick Rose]

Ohhh my goodness! I have never read such beautiful writings in my life!

[BBBBBBBBB]

I LIKE PIE

[AGAG]

Ohhh my goodness! I have never read such beautiful writings in my life!

It is like watching angels farting over each other. Amazing indeed..

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Baconbutt Blues
By A10, LPS

Arnold spied you at a glance,
Last night at the salsa-dance,
He used all of his charms,
And had you in his arms,
A true grocery-boy romance

Arnold rose to his feet,
(He could not fit in his seat),
And upon a whim,
He pointed at him,
And said "LETS TAKE THIS TO THE STREET"!

Arnold woke to the site of a crowd,
Stood on his feet and cried "HUH!", right out loud,
Didn't know where he was,
But felt pain in his jaws,
And to the McDonalds, he plowed...

But Arnold thought carefully about this endeavor,
And since his mind is sharp and clever,
He struck a deal with the cook,
Got a new coupon-book,
And now he is larger than ever

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Thank you for taking so good care of your protege Arnold Butt, since I have taken my protecting hands from him...


Huh this has been like a cure,

And now I feel clean and pure,

My life has been nice,

And I really feel wice,

Since that Arnold I no longer must endure.


He wasn't some sort of a saint,

As you say when you so galant,

Make him without all wrong,

And you make him your song,

Of his fatbutt that no longer make me faint.


I am glad that he now is back in Leeds,

And are dancing along in some speeds,

I have paid him my dept,

For the bedfun when we slept,

And I no longer have to stand all his needs.

Huhhuh what an experience it has been. Huu. My German heart!

[HinatAArcticA]

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Huh! And whos mouth can this be? Pekka Fucking Nurmis? And what sort of strange persons are those IN the mouth? Huh!

[Derrick Rose]

I LIKE PIE

ME 2

[Derrick Rose]

M&M is bad for you...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

You are talking in riddles... At least for me!

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Wow. What can I say, except Arnold Layne is PISSED. Every since he read your last poem, he has been comp-layne-ing about his eyes. His fucking eyes.

He received a vaspvirus sting to his baconbutt, and now everything he reads is in teal. It is a real tragedy: here is a poem to describe the situation.

Arnold Layne got dumped,
By a German nut,
So Arnold went home slumped,
With his baconbutt.

Now Arnold is so depressed,
Everything he reads is in teal,
And what can make him any less stressed,
Perhaps, another meal.

Now Arnold seeks help from,
The wise man known as Hubble,
To restore the font color for this chum,
And give his eyes less trouble

'Cause if he doesn't get help soon,
He will continue to chew,
And there will be no door left,
That Arnold can fit through...

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Stunning relevation.
Arnold caught on film!!!

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[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

A german nut?? So that is how you see me? A nut? What sort? Walnut maybe, with a wrinkled shell? Huh!

Arnold Butt is not my business any longer and may he chew on, as best as he could. I have sonatas and a sweei grocery-boy to take care of. The fat problem from Leeds is history for me and if you like to take over him, you have my German blessing. But I can tell you one thing. He is NOT cheep to have and hold. He eats and chews all day long and the fun you have with him ,if you don't like to look at chewing jaws, is not overweighting. But I will maybe write a chewingsonata to him some day.

I will also thank you for the video. He has shown it 298 times (brown chicken with red chinanoodles). And I will warn you for his porn-acting-films if you aren't in need for a quick vomit...

Good luck to you.

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Here I found a song for you Hippo. Jaja!

Here is a silly ditty,
You can sing it right away,
Here is what I have to say,
So sing it while you may,

Oh, I don't want him, you can have him,
He is too fat for me,
He is too fat for me,
He is too fat for me,

I get dizzy,
I get dumbo,
When I'm dancing,
With the jum-jum-jumbo,
Can he prance up a hill?
Nonononono,
Can he dance a quadrille?
Nononono,
Does he fit in your coupe,
By himself he is a groupe,
Cold he possibly?
Sit upon your knee?
Nononono,
So I don't want him, You can have him,
He is all too faaaat for me.
Jaja!

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Arnold threw a party in the county jail.
The prison band was there and they began to wail.
Arnold was jumpin' and the joint began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out jailbirds sing.

Let's chew, Everybody, let's chew.
Everybody, everybody, everybody you knew
was eating in the jailhouse chew.

Edward Jones was in there for attempted rape,
Leroy embezzled every dollar he could scrape,
Jimbo shot the bank teller, crash, boom, bang,
And Arnold Layne was in there for his clothingsline gang,

Let's chew, Everybody, let's chew.
Everybody, everybody, everybody you knew
was eating in the jailhouse chew.

The sad sack was a sittin' on a block of stone
way over in the corner weepin' all alone.
Arnold said, "Hey, don't you be no square."
"Can I borrow your shirt? I'll give it back, I swear"

Let's chew, Everybody, let's chew.
Everybody, everybody, everybody you knew
was eating in the jailhouse chew.

Number forty-seven said to number three:
"You're the fattest jailbird I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
come on and do the Jailhouse Chew with me."

Let's chew, Everybody, let's chew.
Everybody, everybody, everybody you knew
was eating in the jailhouse chew.....

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Are you sure, you are not a Schiller after all? But I have to admit that your choice of subject talkes against that. Jails!? Whatever! I have to do my very best, since your muffins are really yumyumnom...

There are no muffins, like your muffins,
Everything about them is appealing,
The onions, the bacons and the mealing,
No where else I get that happy feeling,
When I am stealing ,
One or two.

There are no muffins, like your muffins,
They make me smile whereever I go,
Even with a burned turkey under your bed,
You will not be stranded or without cred.
And I wouldn't change them for a sack og gold,
Please bake me some as you me told.

Since no muffins, can be like your muffins
Hey and behold.

The butcher, the grocer, the clerk,
Are secretly unhappy men, because,
They get paid for what they do, but no applause,
They gladly did their dreary jobs good bye,
For your muffins and I tell you why,
There are no muffins like your muffins,
And I say it is so.

You are smiling when your oven is filling,
And it is thrilling,
I wish I know,
How do you do it. So how how?

You get my prize before you even started,
And without your muffins I am broken-hearted,
So please bake on, in your big kitchenshow.
For there are NO muffins like yours...

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

Aber doch Arnold! Sorry to say, it didn't work with the Groceryboy. He was so boring! He would only talk about the prise on macaroni, sugar or meal and he thought that a Sonata was some sonar for detecting the presens and location of a submerged object with soundwaves. Huh!
So if you can forgive my rude treatment of you, would you please think of coming back to Germany. I will buy the steaks as before, but by someother butcher without a deliveryboy. Sure Arnold...

:luv1: :luv1:

[Arnold Layne]

500g top sirloin
300g filet mignon
700g ribeye
500g porterhouse
450g chuck

Bring these to Leeds by Monday. Wrapped in clothes! Of all shapes and sizes. With dots, buttons, zippers, pockets, seams, threads, patches, and stripes! Wonderful, wonderful stripes!:mrgreen: Jaja.

Then we will talk.

Arnold Layne

[Karlheinz Stockhausen]

"THEN we will talk"??? You think so Arnold? But NO Arnold I don't give in to extortion by threats or pressure to gain more steaks and other fattening nomnoms resulting from or operative on my German War-conscience, that You well know is a big thorn in MY butt.
I have till that never even heard of those meatpartions (are you now an English slaughter too, Arnold), so you have to bundle of and come here. Capisce! I am not THAT affected of love-sick-ness as you maybe believe. HUH Arnold!

Karlheinz Stockhausen Title unnecessary...