Most nicest poster

[AAAAAAAAAA]

They totally messed up!!

When they came to clean up the mess at the Royal Palace, they heard someone, under a bench crying, "Priapus, Priapus, help!" They chopped through the stiffened mucus and found...a woman!!

[Stratowarius]

This was completely new to me! I never wrote that!

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Pfffffffffffffffffffffff!!

[Stratowarius]

pffffffT on yourself

[NeverendingAbyss]

Would Priapus handle this beast?

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Ghostdog, "BUUUU! May I tell you a secret, dear?
It's such a burden on my heart!"

Cow scared to death, "Muuu Muuu! Help,help! A ghostdog!"

Ghostdog, "I'm gonna eat you, dear! Filet mignon!
Skin and bone!"

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

I will make a Shakespeare-inspired attempt
to cheer you up...


The unhappy Bladders own song.


To be a Bladder or not,
That is my question,
Is it really worth while, to stay,
Here in the internal cavity,
Along those bladder-hardships,
And give up the hopes to this urine-flow,
Maybe nibble Prosac and Lithium,
For the lonely rest of bladderlife,
And lose my will of action?

Or better end my organ-life now and here,
To die, to sleep,
And go to undiscovered land,
Where there is no return,
That is my sad and acrid question...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

But, but, I am already here!
I sit on the boxtop, writing poems
and eating Moss-Muffs, all day long.
Where are you running along now?

Try to take a jump down, to the thread under,
(huh, now suddenly over),"Game of Thrones",
and bumkabum, you are in the right place,
for bladders! In"My nicest"!

Huh, how disorientated one can be, there in the abdomen!

[The Bladder]

I have finally found your nicest. How odd, this forum is so vast. I am used to cramped, confined and humid places. This is a relief. I am much happier to be here. But still sad and lacking purpose.

And your rhymes...what talent! They roll off your tongue like urine down the urethra. Where did you get them? I want to know everything. I think there is a lot that I, a simple bladder, can learn from you. I want to know of the arts. Please share everything you know. :luv1:

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Wow, you are a strange Bladder.
Sometime I will tell you a secret, but now I am too stressed. So I will be back...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Rhymes? Simple, dear Bladder. I steal them from the Baker, as I now steal from my lunchtime...

Jaja, it serves him right, The theft I mean!
He once called me an IGNORANT FOOL, in REDletters.

[The Bladder]

I understand that you think I am a strange bladder. I do find that hurtful but I forgive you because you are my only friend. The liver, the kidneys, and the pancreas look down upon me as a lesser organ. I am not surprised that you do the same.

The humans they always drink something or another. Be it water, coffee, or that abominable diet pepsi, they guzzle it by the gallon. Just when I have some room to breathe free they fill me up again. Each minute that passes is another minute that those vile bastards are slurping or glurping something down, at my expense. Will I ever find some peace?

Can you tell me a little about the baker? Why do you steal his rhymes? Wouldn't it be easier to come up with your own rhymes rather than steal from that poor defenseless baker? And what does he bake, anyway? Is he the baker of rhymes?

Can you also tell me about frederick chopin? I hear he is no chopped liver. I do love the piano but I prefer the organ, naturally...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh, dear! I think we have a little
problem to solve. You are not really aware
of your situation, and that you now are
a free Bladder. You have left the restrained
life in a human body and are replaced there,
by a pig-bladder. And the transplant works.

The poor man is recovering.
I have seen him. He nöff-nöffs...


Now you have to get used to be a bladder,
without tedious urine-out-flows, a couple of
times, every day, and have to learn to adapt
as an empty rag. You have a beautiful, a little
naive soul, in there, and as your best friend,
I will teach you everything I know,
and even play Chopin for you.
Then I hope you don't piss on my art.


I understand that the meaning of my life is
to be a full-time-bladder-caretaker, so welcome
to a free bladder-life, me and "My Nicest"...

[The Bladder]

Day 2 of freedom and I continue to piss my life away. I have come to miss the sensation of being full of warm yellow pee.. it was therapeutic somehow I suppose. Still life is better on the outside and I wonder of my previous host who now has a goat heart. The hircine! Hahahahahaha.

The freckled girl cares for me night and day, tending to my every need and organ-izing some entertainment. I suspect that she in fact intends to use me as a second, backup bladder in her own body!! It is part of her nefarious plan to sit through an entire season of "game of thrones" without stopping to pee! I suspect her motives but have no concrete evidence....

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear! I think the questionmarks,
about your situation, are still not
extended, so I will try to enlighten
you!

Your host was, just as you presumed,
a big hircin, and that is nothing for
you to hahahaa at.
His bladder was accordingly a goatbladder,
and that is why you smell as you do.
We have to bath you several times more,
before I can give you access to furnished
rooms...

I loyally share this incubationperiod with
you, and no one knows where I am. Officially
I have disappeared, with the giant on
Granada, and CNN has sent out a rescue-team
after us. But I beamed, in the giants bubble,
to "My Nicest", and then you came into my
life.

Now it is so sad to hear, that you sometimes
see me as an evil and dodgy bladderthief.
But I am NOT and I don't need a bladder2! I
seldom gaze at TV, and I know nothing more
about that "throne-thing", than those "spoilers"
I have seen on this forum.

Please, don't mistrust me, I am your best friend,
and I will try to fix some delicate moss-muffs
for you...
:comfort:

[The Bladder]

It did not occur to me that I am a goat bladder. What an unfortunate revelation. A broadside, so to speak. So it seems I will smell of goatpiss for the rest of my short life. What is the life expectancy of a goat bladder anyway? I would like to know how much time I have to experience the world at its fullest, now that i am free from the confines of a hairy-fingered hircine body.

I am so grateful to hear that you have no intentions of swallowing me and using me as a backup bladder for when you drink jumbo sized sodas and the like. We have established a trust and a good friendship in my time here and I am grateful for that. However, I remain horribly depressed at my situation, as well as my social status among the various organs, and feel that my life has no meaning and each day is yet another fruitless endeavor. I wish to leave your basement and travel in a wonderful adventure across the world, soaking up knowledge like a sponge. Then I wish to return and write wonderful poems for you and your father Hubble describing my learnings, to thank you for your hospitality. I also intend to bring back spices.

But as a mere organ i have no income, no means of transportation, and have no personal belongings besides the bladder-shirt that you kindly knit for me. However, I will find a way. Mark my words, my bestest friend.

(Can you make me a moss muffin smoothy instead? I am all about the liquids, my dear...)

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear! I am so happy to take
care of you and I have made you
a blue dress. Blue is your color
and not that pee-yellow you had before.

I have also found my old doll-bed
in the attic and now you can sleep
there and not in my bed.

Don't worry about economy. My money
is your money and I can take you abroad,
if that is what you want.

You are a little goat-bludder-bladder. Jaja...
:luv1: :luv1:

[The Bladder]

Thanks for the dress. But I am afraid it makes my fundus look far too big, and that simply will not do. Can I pleeeeeeeeeeeeaase have another?

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear! Of course I will make more dresses.
When I know what your "fundus" is, and where
it is placed on your robust body!

:oops:I don't want to be imprudent!!

[Arnold Layne]

I, Arnold, will take the sorry little bugger off your hands. Truth be told, I've been looking for a secondary bladder ever since my other one drowned in high fructose corn syrup. It was an unfortunate affair. How many pounds do you want for him? I can offer you kilograms as well. I have plenty to go around, you know.


Always yours,
Arnold Layne

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear! Arnold, I thought we were friends
and now you want to take my bladderdarling
from me! Please! You don't need him as much
as I do! He fills an empty room, in my soul,
with his helplessness. Let me keep him and don't interfere,
or listen to my implacable father...

I'm sure there are other, less amiable, bladders
that can fill the requirement for your well-being...

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Oh dear! Arnold, I thought we were friends
and now you want to take my bladderdarling
from me! Please! You don't need him as much
as I do! He fills an empty room, in my soul,
with his helplessness. Let me keep him and don't interfere,
or listen to my implacable father...

I'm sure there are other, less amiable, bladders
that can fill the requirement for your well-being...

I wish to bring to your attention that Arnold Layne is no longer restricting his petty theft to women's knickers. He has applied sophisticated techniques to hack into my account and now spews propaganda at will! He has been PMing pictures of his kebab to every female member of this forum, extorting and threatening them to fulfill his filthy desires. And also for sex! HUH!

Arnold A^10

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear!. I understood long ago,
that Arnold would be a nuisance,
with all his hackings, and
that he was after you.
He is so envious of your sweet
charm, and your moss-muffins,
and since his sneeze-allergy
hinders him from even peeping,
he has tried those other ways.

But why haven't I got a single pic
of his kebab?
Or any filthy desires? Why exclude me?
What have I done to deserve this?

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Arnold will surely send you pictures of his kebab and maybe i can write some poems. Be patient please..

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Oh dear! Sorry! My patience has gone with the wind...

huiiiiiii...

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Oh I'm terribly sorry. My schedule can be quite erratic.

I just don't feel the creative juices flowing through me. Perhaps Arnold drank them? You know how he likes sweets....

Is juice a sweet?

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

Ja, the extractable fluid,
that contains of cells or tissues,
can be sweet or sour, and it is
the basic force or strength of your power.
So, do what you can to get it to flow
again, or you will dry up. Huh! :luv1:

[AAAAAAAAAA]

My fluids have dried,
I have nothing to say,
No nouns are supplied,
My verbs flew away,

My participles won't participate,
My pronouns ran off,
My adjectives won't acclimate,
My prepositions have the cough,

It seems that all my parts of speech,
Went off for a day at the beach...

[ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ]

The Baker had problem with his flow,
To the beach he felt he must go,
If I take a swim,
I'm sure I can rhyme,
All the words will spring up and grow.


You see what a little swim can do...

[AAAAAAAAAA]

I'm too lazy to write a poem so i'm going to share one someone else wrote. A professional!


As I Grew Older
Langston Hughes

It was a long time ago.
I have almost forgotten my dream.
But it was there then,
In front of me,
Bright like a sun-
My dream.
And then the wall rose,
Rose slowly,
Slowly,
Between me and my dream.
Rose until it touched the sky-
The wall.
Shadow.
I am black.
I lie down in the shadow.
No longer the light of my dream before me,
Above me.
Only the thick wall.
Only the shadow.
My hands!
My dark hands!
Break through the wall!
Find my dream!
Help me to shatter this darkness,
To smash this night,
To break this shadow
Into a thousand lights of sun,
Into a thousand whirling dreams
Of sun!