Thinking of quitting one of my bands...

[NeonVomit]

Sorry for making this long, but I'm at a bit of a loss.

I play in 2 bands. One is a female-fronted power-ish metal band, and the other is an old-school black/thrash metal band. I'm thinking of leaving the first one. I initially joined them to help out for a show, but I ended up staying with them for more. I wanted to write original material, but they are happier doing covers, which require less work. I actually had some plans for this band, where to take it and what to do, but I feel myself being restricted by the others. As if to confirm it all, I had a show with them tonight which really didn't go well. No huge, obvious mistakes, no terrible sound... just something didn't feel right. There were some mistakes and slip-ups here and there (many by me)... but the energy felt wrong. I've been thinking about this for a long time, and this pretty much confirmed it.

At the same time, I want to focus on my other band. Although the potential for material I truly enjoy is lower, they're far more eager to produce our own stuff, write our own songs and try things out.

Sounds like an open-and-shut case, correct? Unfortunately, I've managed to find myself not willing to make the move. I've gotten pretty friendly with the guys (and girl) in the other band, and I'm not trying to sound arrogant, but I don't think they'd cope without me. I'd be ruining them. While at the same time, the other band which I want to focus on.. the other 2 members have some other musical commitments.

What should I do? Either stay where I am, and continue fooling myself into thinking that's what I want, quit and focus on another band where the other members have their own, other, projects ongoing, or the extreme option which is leave both and try to start from scratch, which is difficult for me, as I don't know enough people.

I'm stuck here. I'm not asking for answers, because I know only I can properly answer this for myself. I'm asking for suggestions, other ways of looking at this problem.

Apologies for getting personal, and thanks to whoever read through that and chooses to reply.

[Holy Light]

I'd say try and form a new band as to what you want to do. It's possible, just might take a while. No sense in playing in a band if you don't enjoy it.

[Miguel_Ricardo]

I'd say, or make a new one, or keep trying to convince your friends about composing.

[Jaakko]

How much time do you have in your hands? Of course you shouldn't do anything that doesn't feel comfortable and having a gig and not enjoying it pretty much settles it, that band is out. I mean isn't playing gigs kinda the best thing a musician can have?

I can only suggest you figure out what kind of music really gets you and finding the best players you can to join that project. If old-skool black/thrash stuff makes it for you, then put your 100% to it, if not, you have a 3rd band to find.

And if you only love playing, take the stress off the picture by closing your eyes and play every rehearsal, writing/studio session and gig with both (or all) bands having fun all the way

[Ahlimatainen]

OK, I'm a guy who thinks that you should do whatever's right for you. But I'm in a not that undifferent seat.

This is the case: I'm playing in this heavy metal band with a 20 % power mixture. Both me and the other guitarist(who happens to be a kickass keyboard player) want to play pure power metal.

However it seems like a gamble to quit one band just to be left with something that could turn into nothing.

I feel sometimes(more often now days) that there's something missing, that spark you get when everything is great...

[stratoplayer]

Well, my friend, id say discuss it with them, no strings attached and tell them what your focus is and some possible compromises you could make, if they are not interested or plainly blow you off, then tell them ¨so long¨

[Ahlimatainen]

Well the problem is: I kinda did that and the drummer refuses to play it and the other guys you play neutral and doesn't chare their oppinion wich kinda sux... so it's kinda like if it's equal(me vs the drummer) nothing happens so it's just a standstill. But tomorrow(1st of january) I have talkt to lots of people and we're gonna put together another band... we'll se how it goes...

[Aresius]

for NEONVOMIT: Well, show your band your material or ideas, and if they still dont want to compose you should ask each of your bandmates if they are intresting in making a band that composes, if they dont then you should start a band from 0