Most nicest poster

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 2:41 am

Thank you, Dr. errrrr....

the nomnoms helped. I think I have to go back to the cave (under Stratowarius' bed). His fishliveroil and waffle crumbles are a part of a healthy day!

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 3:01 am

NeverendingAbyss wrote: Thank you, Dr. errrrr....

the nomnoms helped. I think I have to go back to the cave (under Stratowarius' bed). His fishliveroil and waffle crumbles are a part of a healthy day!

Yes Nea, I think you better come here again. That strange professor Strangesignes isn't good for you and the nonnoms can be dangerous. Keep to our natural nomnomnoms...

+#)!(!]"\^*|< · Post by **+#)!(!]"\^*|<** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 6:48 pm

I am a doctor- here me roar
Strawarii is a meretrix (that means "a whore")
He buys his stethoscopes from the "dollar store"
He charges extra to the poor...

:cyclop:

:crazy1: :cyclop:

:crazy1:

His nonnom treatment is utter junk,
His nurses are all former monks,
He'll rip you into little chunks,
He smells like a hircine (worse than a skunk)

:ola:

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:01 pm

I strongly support Obama's UNIVERSAL health care.

Fact check from CNN confirmed that I can keep my doctor.

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:34 pm

Is dr Strangsignes "your" doctor? Must you keep him? Are you happy over that? Are you in your senses?? DONT EAT MORE NONNOMS. They affect your brain...

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:38 pm

I... can't.
nomnoms are addictive. My, my! What did Dr. Errrrrrr put in those nomnoms?! Could he be..... Timo Tolkki!??!?!?!?!?!

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:07 pm

Can you see how affected you are? Of course he isn't TT!

The nonnom makes you paranoid!!! Can you use up your powers to the uttermost and come here at once. I think I have an antidote for you, but we must be swift. That fucking doctor is no doctor but some scoundrel that is after you. Come on Nea! Get out!!!!

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 1:38 am

I broke out! Those german shepherds were hard to delude, but somehow I was able to leave the place after I found a string, a box, a stick, and nomnoms which the dogs devoured. I don't know if Dr. Errrrr is back. I left the canines trapped. But wait...
there's that... SPACE NEEDLE!

I'm in Seattle! How did I end up here?! I was in the ranch but after the place was empty I started to eat nomnoms... OLD nomnoms... I cannot recall anything after I left the ranch. I think... I think I was ambushed. Could that have been Dr. Errrr?

I'm going to the masked man because the streets in Seattle are dangerous at night. Ten minutes away from a former member... I will be back once daylight shines again!

+#)!(!]"\^*|< · Post by **+#)!(!]"\^*|<** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:15 am

Welcome to seattle!
Ten minutes away from a miserere, you will find a brown cardboard box. Please knock- don't be shy! A dear old friend of mine resides there and is eager for your company. Tell him you're Timo Tolkki (its our code word, you know...)

I think he'll fix you up in no time... :crazy1:

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 1:23 pm

NeverendingAbyss wrote:I broke out! Those german shepherds were hard to delude, but somehow I was able to leave the place after I found a string, a box, a stick, and nomnoms which the dogs devoured. I don't know if Dr. Errrrr is back. I left the canines trapped. But wait...
there's that... SPACE NEEDLE! I'm in Seattle! How did I end up here?! I was in the ranch but after the place was empty I started to eat nomnoms... OLD nomnoms... I cannot recall anything after I left the ranch. I think... I think I was ambushed. Could that have been Dr. Errrr?
I'm going to the masked man because the streets in Seattle are dangerous at night. Ten minutes away from a former member... I will be back once daylight shines again!

Nea! Run like hell!!!! This is a trap!!! Leave Seattle immediately!!!

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 9:24 pm

Guided by Icecab21, I made it out perfectly fine. Isn't it strange? Icecab managed to help me break free!

I'm going back to that cozy and warm place under your bed. Make room if you have shoes or a bowflex hidden there. I will tell you about my mishap adventures with tea and nomnoms (real nomnoms)

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 11:21 pm

The territory under my bed available for immidiate occupation. Shoes never there! Earlier only some nomnomnomrests, from happier days-now tidied up by me myself. Cosy logfire running. Waffleiron ready. You are welcome...

Edit: Have I ever had a BOWFLEX under my bed??? What is that???

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Thu Oct 29, 2009 9:12 pm

Stratowarius wrote:Have I ever had a BOWFLEX under my bed???What is that???

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Fri Oct 30, 2009 10:05 am

Did you really fear that this clumsy creaturething had his lodging under my bed??

For what? You don't know me at all after all this time...

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Fri Oct 30, 2009 9:03 pm

Clearly Morko was planning something...

But now you can be stronger than ever! For just $29.99 a month, 20 minutes a day, you will have that refined shape you always wanted. Call now

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Sat Oct 31, 2009 10:20 am

I have exactly the shape I want and need no bowflex and YOU ought to know that by now. And that poor Mörkö had other things on his mind than torturemachines

I can hardly see him on something like that. He has not a figure made for bowflex, that's for sure. And he is blue already...

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Sat Oct 31, 2009 5:44 pm

Wasn't the bowflex used in Hammer 6?

+#)!(!]"\^*|< · Post by **+#)!(!]"\^*|<** » Sat Oct 31, 2009 6:30 pm

Hammer 6 was an instant classic!!

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Sat Oct 31, 2009 6:48 pm

I think you guys mix Hammer with Saw. It happens all the time, but they are very different.

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Mon Nov 02, 2009 3:22 pm

NeverendingAbyss wrote:
Stratowarius wrote:Have I ever had a BOWFLEX under my bed???What is that???

You forgot to give us the description over how it works, but fortunately I have come across one.

1 If you want to be tortured to another shape, place your butt on the chair. Then bend forward and seize the handles.
2 From behind come two hard lumps up and start to pound on your back. They pound and pound for about ten minutes. When the back is red and really sore they stop and the twelve whipping feelers start their destructive work. They whip and whip and after further ten minutes, they stop and bend over you. Then they twine themself around your body and squeeze till there is not so much of the old you left. In the same time the handles move forward and you are cought between the handles and the feelers. All fat and muscles are stretched out and after three weeks treatment a 29 dollars a week your shape is 27 cm longer and in a corresponding degree 27, or even more cm thinner.
3 If you by some unforeseen reason got dispirited from your activities the BOWFLEX have an ultimate solution even for that. As you can see, there is a red blotch under the handles. Now it is really simple. You lay your head on that spot (old blood from earlier victims) and press a red button. Swisch, swisch, your head is decapitated by that guillotine you can see over the handles. Post a basket there to catch up the head. It's more wellbehaved to do so.

As you can understand, the BOWFLEX is with you in all kinds of situations, and of course it is well worth your investment. Buy today and you get two legstretchers into the bargain...

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Mon Nov 02, 2009 5:32 pm

JAJAJAJAJAJA that was epic!

...but... what part is the chair?

I found this from a reliable source, explaining how to workout 20 minutes a day, three times a week

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Mon Nov 02, 2009 7:04 pm

You must be controlled or influenced by artful, unfair or insidious persons, to their advantage. Take care...

AAAAAAAAAA 2.0 · Post by **AAAAAAAAAA 2.0** » Tue Nov 03, 2009 12:04 am

After Timo Tolkki consumed my microphallus, I considered myself to be a fallen hero. Indeed, my missing microphallus does not make me a homosexual, but rather a figure of faith like Martin Luther King or Glenn Beck. Fox News taught me something today. Something that is subtle and opaque to truly understand. Jon Stewart proclaims Fox News are NOT news... but I know! I KNOW! Glenn Beck is the greatest man in the world. His tea party protest was an inspiration to my escape. I love him like a brother.
Probably you are wondering how I managed to escape from the clutches of Timo Tolkki's claws. Well, it was the bowflex. It was in the back of the house covered in dust and spider webs. I wonder when was the last time Timo Tolkki used it. The manufacturer said it was especially assembled for him.
Anyway, I was able to grow my body into a fearing hulk. I broke the chains of fear and gave Timo Tolkki a tasteful treat. He enjoyed it as much as I did. Thanks to those nomnoms and Venezuela Boy, I managed to nullify my captor. After the extrication, I reunited with the As to watch Hammer 7: The Return to Vonderland. What a great month it's been.

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Tue Nov 03, 2009 12:42 pm

Welcome back to freedom. It is great that you managed to Hulk-work-out from your captivity and that Bowflex helped you. I have never seen a Bowflex in reality, only read the use-concept and looked at the result in Neas video (both very frightful, but maybe I can sell my nitro-oil for polishing to those Hulks.)
Sorry for the loss of your micro-anything-phallus but don't despair. Priapus can help you.
I agree about Hammer 7. It was really the most entertaining film I saw in many good days. Much better than Saw 6 that I saw before Hammer 7.
I plan to go to Texas after this semester and hope to see you all there. Hell Priapus. (I am number 464,I think)

AAAAAAAAAA · Post by **AAAAAAAAAA** » Wed Nov 04, 2009 8:38 am

Agreed! Hell Priapus!

His cameo appearance in Hammer 7 was unbelievable. Of course his "tool" was more of a screwdriver, if you know what I mean.

But urm- I have an embarrassing problem.
After the reunion was announced I took the first train to Texas. Life was good! But for some reason the people here store their shit in bags!? The stench is simply unbearable, partly because there are hircismus among us, and partially because I am using the aforementioned bags as pillows (Stinky was using them as sleeping bags but we put a quick end to that). Also the place is tainted with some poisoned NONNOMS and keeping NeoTolkki™ away from them is a full time chore...

Priapus has ordered everyone a brand new bowflex, though he is preoccupied with some microphallus stretches and strengthening exercises. Some of us (myself included) who have had our micromacromedios gobbled up must resort to other ways to expend our free time.

For instance, Stinky is bringing in some money part time as a meretrix, while Chris P. Bacon is selling cinnamon-toast buncombes in the local market. I, on the other hand, have been hunting for misereres and troglodytes in the nearby caves and have been quite successful!

Overall, life is good. I can't wait until Hammer 8!

:ola:

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Wed Nov 04, 2009 1:28 pm

Thank you for the update! It seems alarmimgly unsanitary in Texas and it is maybe not a good idea to visit you now. After all it is not more shiting persons you need there.
I thought Priapus was a God with high codes of conduct and it surprises me that he allows his congregation to place their shit in bags. (Does Midi know that his childhoodpranks are established as a habitual method in Phallus??

)
Priapus must have descended from his old greek hights, without passing GO and he sees maybe shit as a natural consequence from eating. But why bags?

(Now we are really back in the analstage, where we are concerned with faeces-plus the micromediomacros. Can we go further back in our development? Do we risk to be Misereres?

)
Both you and A2,0 have got your micros gobbled up by someone (No names,no flames).How could you allow that? Drugs involved? Or was it more symbolic?
Now you put all your hope in that Hadesmashine, the fucking Bowflex. But, but, believe you me, no micros will ever grow from using that torture-thing and when I have introduced my Nitro-oil for Hulk-muscle-polishing, the Bowflex will soon come in disrepute.
Talking about selling things. What do you do with the cave-troglodytes? Have they some value in the market? If so, what about the Hircismus? Maybe we are dealing with a fortune here???

Hell Priapus.

NeverendingAbyss · Post by **NeverendingAbyss** » Wed Nov 04, 2009 10:19 pm

I'm certain the misereres will be subject to blood and flesh in the attempt to rise a new microphallus. Priapus never accepts demands without periods

(from what I heard)

AAAAAAAAAA · Post by **AAAAAAAAAA** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 1:26 am

Well, the going rate for troglodyte furs is 20 nom-noms/ea.
Miserere tusks are going at 15 nn/ea if I am not mistaken.

Avatar_Thief told me that if I give him 300 nom-noms, he will borrow someone's "micromacromedio" on my behalf. Lets hope it isn't another yoctophallus; I have a hard time keeping Jenn away as is.

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 1:40 am

We went to see Hammer Seven,

And to shop att Seven-Eleven,

When "Someone"( no names, no flames,) took my hand,

And I can't understand,

Why I thought I was in Heaven.

Stratowarius · Post by **Stratowarius** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 2:03 am

AAAAAAAAAA wrote:Well, is the going rate for troglodyte furs is 20 non-noms/ea.
Miserere tusks are going at 15 nn/ea if I am not mistaken.

Avatar_Thief told me that if I give him 300 nom-noms, he will borrow someone's "micromacromedio" on my behalf. Lets hope it isn't another yoctophallus; I have a hard time keeping Jenn away as is.

Do you think that 300 nomnoms is a fair value for those furs? Nonono!! You must think a little more economic. You use, how much nomnom as bait? And how many Cave-troglodytes can you catch with that? You must have something for your work-more than the pleasure.

I can understand that it is no fun to borrow some risky micro and yoctos are very common in Texas nowadays, so be careful, when you use it. Anything can happen to he that borrows an yocto and we have seen what Avatar has come up with before. Some really strange spoil...

Edit. Breaking news. I heard that venezuela boy has found a quattuordecimphallus so if you hurry you can be the first to bid on that...

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