Most nicest poster

[Stratowarius]

I got this mail today: But I will not give in. Alien-Pekka is my mission.

"Hi there Stratow in fucking Helsinki! Pekka speaking!

Since you seem so fucking interested in me, I will give you something you can appreciate and it will spare that fucking hacker some fucking trouble. Unknown Same is resting and has not beamed himself somewhere. All that talk was a big joke and you fucking fell for it. Everyone knows that I am an innocent and innocuous goatfarmer, that happens to have befriended huge Hugo C. and that we are making a record for "Friend-Zuela-China-Company".
Aliens? Bah! Do you really think that ANYONE would believe something so fucking stupid? Tinstomach? Allergic to sushi? Jaja, that is true, but that is the only fucking thing you got right.
But I will nevertheless help you with your fucking post and give you huge Hugos last song. Because we
need PR and I am such a fucking nice guy.
It goes like this and it is rattling like thunder since we use 20 drummers here.

Zuela song.

We zuelans go to our final fight,
With our heads high outright,
We hope we soon can something detonite,
And this time not be to late.

United forever in frienship so light,
We follow our leader, our golden knight,
We tip our hats to the new revolution,
And take a bow for our left-wing-constitution,
Smile and grin at the change all around,
Pick up the guitar and make you astound,
Just like yesterday we play,
And got on our knees to pray,
That we not will be cheated again,
By capitalismuses from Spain,
Lalala. From Spain, lalala, from Spain...

This Stratow, will be a great hit and when I am a big rockstar, maybe you would like to be kidnapped again. By me? (nudge, nudge) But then you must stop that shittalk about me, my tinmicro,my smell and my lovely goats.

[AGAG]

Dear god! this is madness...

[Chris P. Bacon]

why i be damned if i's gon stan for mo o dis foolishness!! git atta hea boy an chun da butta! we's gon ha compni!!

[Stratowarius 2.0]

why i be damned if i's gon stan for mo o dis foolishness!! git atta hea boy an chun da butta! we's gon ha compni!!

Crushingly elegant!

[Stratowarius]

Jaja! I would be upset if Stratowarius were to change her name. I think she made the right decision at this point in time...

[Stratowarius]

Dear god! this is madness...

Would you please explain!! Who is the mad person. I or the scoundrel?

[Stratowarius]

why i be damned if i's gon stan for mo o dis foolishness!! git atta hea boy an chun da butta! we's gon ha compni!!

I so wish that you swollowed that bisquit and took out your majsepipe before you attempted to talk.

[AGAG]

Everynone! this words and thoughts are just misleading

[Stratowarius]

Misleading WHOM? Not me! You?

[Stratowarius 2.0]

Misleading WHOM? Not me! You?

Maybe you should try Britney Spears She will mislead you more

[Stratowarius]

Leave Britney ALONE!

[Stratowarius 2.0]

Leave Britney ALONE!

Why? I love both you and Britney. I have SO broad mind

[Stratowarius]

I'm strarting to think you say that to everyone.

[Stratowarius]

Here is my nice answer to PFN's mail. I gave him a song, for his record.

Pekka Fucking Nurmi's own song.


I am Satana Perkele, big Pekkashithit,

I am hell of SatanaPekkas big gritshit,

A sickening Stunk,

A nausenous Flunk,

A disgusting Drunk,

A shitsmelling Skunk,

Lalala Pecca is me.


I am a lumpy lurk Lork.

A dirty sort of a Vork,

A parasitcork.

Ugly Dreg and Scum-Pork,

And dumb like a Fork,

Lalala Fucking is me.


I am also a wretched Sod,

A slippery Cod,

A hellish Clod,

And a damnable Pod.

Lalala Pekka Fucking Nurmi is me.Lalala.


LPS.

[Stratowarius 2.0]

I'm strarting to think you say that to everyone.

you don't say

[Stratowarius]

I spam DO!

[Stratowarius]

Fax from Crumb.

Hi Stratow!
Today I managed at last to decipher Pekkas mail. He used a new code and thought he could hide, but haha.

PFN: Hi there in shithole whereever! How are you?

USiM: Fine, fine, thanks. And you?

PFN: Terrible! That Stratow has written a fucking Rapsong about me! I was a skunk, a hunk, dumb as a funk and I don't know what. I could have ignored it, if not huge Hugo had happened to love the wretched shit. He will record it, as my solonumber and you can read it on that damn Stratoforum.

USiM: So! So! It can't be that very, very bad!

PFN: It can! It can! And the world will laugh at me. I hate Rap more than anything and I hate goldchains and fucking juvels, but must wear shit like that on the cover. I will look like a Christmastree in medio of January.

USiM: Haha! Sorry. I must laugh. But it will be a great Christmas-Socio-Commy-Love-Record.

PFN: Nothing to laugh at, dear! I have written a lovesong for you, but nonono it wasn't good enough. I give it to you here!

To my love Harvester 4.

Take my heart and hold my soul,
You the one that makes me whole,
Let me be with you and stay,
I will ask and I will pray.
Keep my heart and hold my soul,
You the one that makes me whole.

Let me not be lost and go,
Let me show, I love you so,
Let me stay with you and we,
Be forever you and me,
Take my heart and hold my soul,
You the one that makes me whole.


PFN: What do you think? I want us to leave this shitty planet now and never come back. Will you?

USiM: Yes,jaja,dada! Let us go! My biological clock is ticking and this planet is no place for children. Come let us leave here now and beam us home to Excessa...



Uiuiuiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Bom-crack- bommelibomcrack!

What was that?

That was Pekka Fucking Nurmi and his beloved Harvester4 that burst through the sound-barrier on theír way HOME...

Don't say that my stories are Neverending, for this was the end of this one.

And what about us? Jajaja we have to stay here and do the best we can of our "shitty" planet and our pahtetic lives. Some of us in this forum will remember Pekka and his adventures for a little while, but on Googles Wikipedia he will stay as long as Google exist and it will say something like this.

Pekka Fucking Nurmi=PFN, Finnish Goat-Farmer and alien on the border Finland-Russia. Allergic to sushi...

[AGAG]

judging by the tone of your posts... Pekka fucking Nurmi must have a heart of gold and be a true gentlemen and a great lover

[Stratowarius]

Yes I think you are right. He was, but in his own way. And only to Excessaladies. This Harvester was maybe equipped to suit him. We Eartlinggirls weren't, so we couldn't estimate him in the right way. I will not miss him...even if he wrote emotional poems...that is for sure.

[AGAG]

Well, humans are different, you can't expect lusty lions to like wolves in the right way. You begin to appreciate others when you accept the infinite distances that keep us apart from each other I wish I could see Pekka once to know if he has the gestures of a wanderer though.

[Stratowarius]

To late if you don't take a trip to Excessa. But you are of course right. You and I could not relate to PFN in the same way. A lusty lion he was not! And neither a forestwild wolf! He was more like an overgrown sheep-goat with a sheepempty "schizofrenic stare" out on the rippled waves. ( Do I learn?)
A wanderer? No! A jumper? Yes! A pervenn? A user. Yes! I don't think you would have liked him at all...

[Stratowarius]

Fax from Crumb!

Hi Stratow!

I have made the simplest hack ever. A chatt with huge Hugo in hotel Hilton Wangfujing in Beijing. He has a colourful language and I give you a translation here. Pendejo=Asshole, Baboso=Idiot, Mierda=Shit, Puta=Bitch, El Burro sabe mas que tu= An ass knows more than you. His mail was sent to Pablo Santoso Joropos at the Financeministry in Caracas.

Huge Hugo=HH: Hi there, Baboso, el Burro sabe mas que tu, send Boliviar immediately, mierda, I mean dollars, Chinamen eat dollars. Mierda!

Finaceman, Pablo Santoso Joropos=PSJ: Si,si senore Premiereministere, but, but, we senda you many dollars last week...

HH: Jajaja. But Chinamen take them all, so you give me more. Open new oilwell, mierda!

PSJ: Si, si, senore Ministrepresidente, but, but may I ask where all dollars go?

HH: To that mierde-puta-record, of course. All those identical-twins Ching-Hongs want fresh money everyday. Maybe they use it as sanitary-paper, those pendejos.

PSJ: I heard that senore Nurmi has disappeared.

HH: Jaja, that Baboso ought to throw himself in a hole. He took his puta and beamed them out to Excessa. He had got a good rapsong from a fan but refused to sing it so I have to fake I am him. It is mierda + 9000. But I will end the record with a happy song to our drugindustry.

Viva Cocazuela.

La Cocaracha, la cocaracha,
We are all, zuelacacha,
Great Socialistefacha,
No capitalespacha,
Singa, singa, alaratcha,
Positivo cocawatcha.
La cocacocaracha, la cocacocaracha.

PSJ: Si si senore Premieremacha. Oh, sorry, sorry

HH: Ah, by all means. There you see. It is catcha-I mean of course catchy. It will be a hit and hit the first place on every chartlist. But enough talk. Send the dollars now, for infiernos sake.

PSJ: Si,si. I give order to taxdepartemente. Viva grande Hugo. Viva + 9000.

[NeverendingAbyss]

Where do you find all this time to do this?
Stwri 4 life!

[AAAAAAAAAA]

I think Stratowarius should run for president of Phallustine. I nominate him!!

[Stratowarius]

Where do you find all this time to do this?
Stwri 4 life!

I have a feeling of De ja vue here! Haven't we in the beginning of our friendship-years ago-talked about just this? Well, well! I will tell you again that this forum is my way of relaxing from the stress of the real life and that it gives me time instead of taking. The same goes for nomnomnom making...

[Stratowarius]

I think Stratowarius should run for president of Phallustine. I nominate him!!

Oh dear! HIM again! Sorry that I went behind your back and wrote to George Z. But I am a bit tired over, that you STILL call me a guy and I got a prompt answer.


HALLO TO YOU DEAR SUNFLOWER. I AM GEORGE Z AND I AM STILL FOUNDER OF CEO AND MENS WEARHOUSE. I UNDERSTAND THAT THIS A'10 TROUBLES YOUR PRETTY LITTLE MIND AND I WILL SOON GIVE HIM A SHARP REPRIMIND. SOME TIME I HAVE BEEN LURKING YOUR FORUM AND HAVE DILIGENTLY DECODED THAT THIS A'PERSONS IMPROPER TREATMENTS OF YOU NO LONGER CAN BE IGNORED.
THIS A'FORUMIT PERPETUALLY PRESENTS YOU AS A MALE AND LIKEWISE EVERLASTING PUTS FOCUS ON SOME MANLY QUALITIES. IN A SINISTER MENTAL MANIFESTATION HE DEMONSTRATES A COMPLETE DOMINATION AT A HIGHLY UNUSUAL RATE. I HAVE DRAWN THE CONCLUSION THAT HE PROBABLY AND MOST LIKELY IS A SHE AND I WILL PERSONALLY TRY TO CONVINCE HER NOT TO CONTINUE THIS CHARAD. SHE OUGHT TO FEEL FREE TO ALLOW THE FEMAL ANIMAL TO ROOM HER.
AND YOU MY DEER FINNISH WILDROSE SHALL BE PERFECT AS PRESIDENT OVER PHALLUS. YOU CAN COUNT ON MY VOTE, DEAR MIDNIGHTSUNFLOWER.

YOURS VERY AFFECTIONATE G,

[AAAAAAAAAA]

Girls with your personality simply do not exist.
They just..don't do this kind of thing :laff:

If you post a picture of your vagina (or ask Robocop to do it) I MIGHT reconsider

[Stratowarius]

:pissed2: :pissed2: :pissed3: :uzi: :uzi: :w00t: :splat: :splat: :puke: :puke: :puke:

God, how DISGUSTING you are! Bläääää...I have never...I have no words...

And yet I am still here. I ought to leave this forum and you, and NEVER come back...But I will do one thing. Never talk to you again...You DISGUSTING Seattleperson...

I am a GIRL, how strange you may think it is...and I don't give a damn if you RECONSIDER or NOT...

And now I am an angry GIRL...

[AAAAAAAAAA]

:pissed2: :pissed2: :pissed3: :uzi: :uzi: :w00t: :splat: :splat: :puke: :puke: :puke:

God, how DISGUSTING you are! Bläääää...I have never...I have no words...

Fine. Perhaps I was hasty in my demands. Sometimes the parity of propriety and phallus is pulled to pieces. But consider how long it's been since you've been under the bed? The ugly bird with its burnt legs sticking high in the air is a thing of the past. The bowflex is gone, and there is plenty of room. Where are you now?

Now, I will admit that Mr. Nurmi charmed me for some time, and my legs turned to spaghetti noodles when I looked into his eyes. :luv3: But that's history! We broke up; he thinks he can be on top, but that's not the way it works in the states.

I saw you celebrating how you passed your biology exam in Helsinki, where you flew for your grandmother's birthday. Your childhood friends from the gradeschool years were all there, including one girl, and two guys. But there was also another man. He was wearing an impeccable business-casual outfit, with a tie. I have reason to suspect that he is a Mr. Zimmer. Now what is that all about?? :pissed4: :pissed4:

And yet I am still here. I ought to leave this forum and you, and NEVER come back...But I will do one thing. Never talk to you again...You DISGUSTING Seattleperson...

If you are a lady, explain why your avatar was a microphallus for so long? Was it some kind of perversion? Then you are either a grossly grotesque ghoul, or a flocculent, fraudulent fellow. And if I may correct you, I am not a Seattleperson. I'M MOVING. :splat:

I am a GIRL, how strange you may think it is...and I don't give a damn if you RECONSIDER or NOT...

There is nothing to reconsider. Your behavior is rather unladylike! Wild flights of fantasy, Pekka this and that, nonsense about Crumb Bond and NASA.... :user:

were you not given dolls to play with in your youth? What kind of behavior is that for a young woman? :nervous:

And now I am an angry GIRL...

The subtleties of PMS are no mystery, to me. I will maintain my cool composure as a firm and strong gentleman, while your hormones skyrocket and liquids trickle down your nether regions. :puke:

[NeverendingAbyss]

I just bought a triceratops!

... and some popcorn!